header header

From Our Mailbox

Published: 2021Updated: 25 December 2023

A selection of letters from our mailbox

Letters may be edited slightly to correct spelling or to clarify meaning. We do not include email addresses but you must let us know how you wish your letter to be signed.

Opinions expressed are those of the writer and not necessarily those of NAMBLA. Letters are published in a spirit of free expression of ideas even if opinions differ from those of NAMBLA. However, only letters containing language of a courteous and civil tone will be considered.


* * *

December 25, 2023

I have been aware of NAMBLA for decades. Back in the 90's I don't think I ever heard anything positive about NAMBLA and I think many of those old negative belief's I remember hearing back then, continue today.

It has taken me awhile to find myself at your cyber doorstep. Afterall, it is taboo to even speak with anyone who could view a young person as we do.

I worked for two decades in the prison system before I decided to leave law enforcement altogether. I saw many men in prison for sex crimes against children, and some were indeed criminal, heinous acts and punishment was warranted.

When I worked in prison I made a point not to read too many files as I found they would only lay out the bare facts of a case as it relates to the law that was broken. The file would not delve into the possibility of any actions being between two consenting individuals because it had no relevance as a defense under the law. One party doesn't have the right to decide who they can invite into their lives because they aren't mature enough. And the other party is just a disgusting freak who should know better.

That sums up, in a nutshell, where the criminal justice system is on this subject.

I grew up in a home that was void of feelings and emotions. Hugs were rare and I was generally neglected. Around the time I was 8 years old I was given my own TV, which in the 80's was a real luxury for a kid. And that TV raised me from that point forward.

I already struggled with making friends and I spent a ridiculous amount of time by myself. I even stopped asking to have birthday parties because I couldn't get anyone to come. So my path to self isolation began.

I would learn many years later that I had been molested by a family member when I was 2 or 3 which created the foundation for my trust issues with people. My molestation was a crime, it was not consensual and brutal enough that I managed to suppress this event through disassociation. Fragments would come back over time and eventually I had enough of the story to know the truth.

I would also experience homophobia and bullying from dozens of tormentors in my grade 8 year. I was labelled as gay, and told to go kill myself most days. What was worse was I didn't want to be gay and I did everything I could to prove otherwise, culminating in me becoming a white supremacist in grade 11 and 12. I'm not proud of that, but it happened.

It was dark times and my light was beaten out of me. I was too stubborn to kill myself, but in retrospect I should have. I didn't even come to accept I was gay until after high school and even then I didn't want it to be true. I managed to program myself with self hatred and internalized homophobia that I was never able to make close connections, and in fact, I have lost every connection and live in complete isolation. Surprisingly I am not lonely. Being alone is all I know.

I find it painfully ironic that I am again at the door of another self truth that I have been programmed to hate. I cannot use words that are clinical or negative in nature for what I am. I have longed to be with a young man for a long time. Age is not really a consideration for me, beyond the law that is. I have found myself attracted to a wide range of ages, in the teenage years. I often wondered if my attraction was because I never once got to experiment with any other boys when I was that age. All I got to do was repress and hate. I have never tried to initiate anything with a younger person and in fact I go out of my way to avoid areas of potential temptation. That said, I have recently admitted to myself that if a young man made a move on me, I don't think I would be able to say no.

During my school years, even though I didn't accept that I was gay, I knew there was interest in the other boys. I had a huge crush on (let's call him) Steve. Steve was short, and I have a thing for short guys. He had a perfect apple butt and a set of the most adorable dimples you've ever seen. Steve and I had gym class together in grade 9. I was over the moon excited because I would finally get the chance to see him naked because we would have to shower after gym. That boy kept his goods under lock and key because In the enter year I only saw his butt once, for two seconds! But that image was burned into my mind and I have thought of that moment in time, often. Steve had been a good friend, but I ended our friendship because I was in love with him, and being that close to someone that would never feel the same way about me, made me wish for death.

To help people understand what life was like for me I would provide the following scenario. I would ask my straight co-workers how they would have felt getting naked at that age, in a room filled with people you are attracted to, and then get yourself to not look at anyone for more than just a blink. Most importantly, never, ever think anything remotely sexual to prevent the dreaded boner and being discovered and (in those days) potentially killed. Most of my coworkers said they hadn't thought about it, but agreed it must have been hard. Pun intended.

All that repression probably did a number on my spirit. Being gay was bad enough and I treated that element of myself accordingly, very poorly. I denied myself every possible encounter when I was young because I didn't want to be gay. Decades later, I'm gay, but I still can't fully act on my desires because law is arbitrary. I am left to fantasize, and I only recently gave myself permission to explore those thoughts.

The most helpful thing to happen as of late was finally getting the nerve to look at your webpage. I agreed with what your organization stands for but most of all, seeing letters from young men, who also want to experience a connection with an older man helped me feel a little bit better. I don't feel like the disgusting freak, because there is potentially a young person out there who would want to be with me. I feel like there are loved ones out there and they are trapped behind a wall, we can see them, but we cannot touch them.

I will say this though, in my experience, the vast majority of the people who support age of consent laws are almost exclusively parents and church goers. I have found people who do not have children, view sexuality in a more fluid way, judging each individual on their own merits. Age is not the consideration, but the maturity level is. I have met some 14 year old's that were more sexually mature than some people in their 20's. Everyone is different, and some people are ready sooner. I know I was masturbating when I was 9 and I was more than ready for everything else by 12. I was ready for it, if not for internalized hatred that made me repress everything I am.

It seems as though I am cursed to live on the fringes of society. Maybe I will never know love. I am reasonably certain that there will never be a significant change in how society views the subject.

Haven't you noticed the hypocrisy how people view the subject? Some scenarios are the worst thing ever while others are akin to nothing more than a joke. For example: An underage female student with a older male teacher is abuse. A younger male student engaged in a sexual relationship with a male teacher is abuse.

A younger male student engaged in a sexual relationship with an older female teacher is seen more as a triumph - it's usually the moms that take issue, the dads are patting the kid on the back and offering them a beer. Even Saturday Night Live made a funny skit about this idea with Pete Davidson. The skit made me laugh, because it was very true.

Thanks for listening.

E.S.

Our reply

Dear E. S.

(The writer sadly refers to himself as "estinguished soul")

Your letter is so touching that it hurts me to the core to read of your pain. We have all had similar experiences, but many of us have had much more supportive parents and friends who helped us endure the emotional suffering you are expressing.

We are not normally set up for therapeutic assistance because the very act of putting out our positive ideas, a kind of activism so to speak, has been a form of self-help.

It is my hope that you can begin resurrecting your soul in the manner you just did by writing us. We would like to publish your letter, but its poignancy requires more than our letters page. Your clear and excellently written letter is a very likely way of helping others in similar situations. To this end, are you willing for us to establish a new page where you, from time to time, can add to your developing feelings? Nothing identifying you should ever be included, as we hew to absolute privacy. Perhaps, in such an exercise, others will also share their feelings and ways to cope.

I sincerely hope you will agree to some form of my suggestion.

Peter

Note: In reponse, though the writer does not feel up to committing to our suggestion right now, he is nevertheless open to the idea when he can bring himself to write again. Meanwhile, anyone who feels he can help others with his own coping experiences is welcome to write us.

* * *

November 26, 2023

Dear NAMBLA

I wish to remain anonymous. I need your advice. I am not from the US but I still want your advice. I don't know how to begin. I have always known that I am gay since childhood. Until when I was 14 I noticed that I became more attracted to minors, in particular with boys. I couldn't talk to anybody about my feelings as my school friends would ostracise me. But it did not matter as I felt more alienated by my friends as I could no longer relate to them, and so I became more isolated and withdrawn from my social circles.

My mental health became a problem and I indulged in self harm as a way to cope. That was until I met this 11-year-old pupil at school when I was 15. We had a friendship with homosexual overtones.Unfortunately Our secret was found out and I was denounced as a pervert at school. No charges, but everybody at school turned against me I never heard of this word before but everyone called me a "paedophile". I looked up the word, and it best described what I am. I am a pedophile.

After I left school I kept my paedophilic tendencies a secret. I fell into depression and started drinking to suppress it all. Unfortunately as the years go by my mental health declined to the point of getting help. I went to see a psychiatrist for an assessment for therapy. The psychiatrist asked if I was a pedophile. In which I denied. I got help and was diagnosed with mental health conditions. I got aftercare and help with my mental health conditions and cleaned up and sober. But I still have one major problem. I still have paedophilic tendencies for boys.

Sadly my mental health is declining again. I am getting help for it and I have relapsed into self harm again. Because my peadophlic tendencies are stronger than ever I want to get help and I am making an appointment to see a psychiatrist for an assessment for treatment. Must I tell the psychiatrist the truth that I am a pedophile. I am so scared of the repercussions of my actions if I do. I have thought of suicide as an option incase of any of this comes out to my family. I need help and advice in hoe to approach this problem of mine.

Yours

Anonymous.

Our reply

Dear Anonymous,

From what you write, there is nothing wrong with you. What is actually wrong is the judgment of your society. This assessment may not make you immediately feel better, but perhaps, as you think about it, it will help you begin to accept yourself.

We are all born with a combination of characteristics unique to each individual. These make up the essence of who we are and cannot change. Trying to do so will only cause great unhappiness.

For most people, those characteristics combine to work well in society. But other orientations or ways of feeling, unfamiliar to the majority, have often been wrongfully seen as bad or evil.

Before going on, please understand that we do not advise breaking any laws of your country relating to your attraction no matter how much we may disagree with some of these laws.

That said, thoughts and feelings, in any decent society, cannot be criminalized. Your feelings belong to you and should be shared only with those whom you deeply trust. Having no one with whom to share these feelings makes it very difficult to live an emotionally satisfying life. But know that there is a huge number of individuals who like you despair alone. But perhaps knowing this, you can begin to feel freer and abandon the condemnation you have internalized.

In a more accepting society, those attracted to minors can make great teachers and mentors. There is plenty of proof for this, but what is true is not always accepted.

Please do not believe the nonsense that is called “pedophilia.” Many who profess to wrongfully label attraction to minors are the same type who hundreds of years ago professed to know how to identify witches.

They never existed, and you definitely are not a witch. From the troubled caring you express, there is no doubt that you surely are a wonderful person.

* * *

November 18, 2023

The following letter expresses a truth that many will recognize. The writer gives his full name. We however never publish any identifying element that could violate the privacy of those sharing the same name and similar situations. In this case, the first name "Andrej" is not that of the signee who provided his full name as well as other information that could identify others with similar identifiers. We have therefor changed those as well without altering the poignancy of the letter.

Hello,

My name is Adrej. I am a 25-year old Serbian living in another European country. When people see me, they see a successful entrepreneur, a good son that always does what he's supposed to. That is all they see, because I have had to hide who I truly am for so long. And what I truly love. And what I truly want in life.

Dear Society,

In the shadows of societal norms, I navigate a forbidden love that defies the laws you've imposed on matters of the heart. Since childhood, I've harbored these feelings, an indomitable flame sparked by forces beyond my control—the magnetic pull of love that transcends your predefined boundaries.

This clandestine connection, born in the crucible of understanding, refuses to be extinguished. The stolen glances and unspoken words etch themselves into the fabric of my existence, testaments to a love deemed illicit by your statutes. The weight of your condemnation is palpable, as we navigate a world where the authenticity of our emotions is reduced to a transgression.

The arbitrary nature of these laws casts a shadow on the sanctity of our emotions, challenging the universal truth that love, at its core, is a force for good. I yearn for a society that celebrates the complexity of love, acknowledging its inability to be confined within narrow corridors of legislation.

In the meantime, this forbidden love, nurtured since childhood, persists—an unwavering flame that, despite your censure, burns brighter each passing day.

My name is Andrej. I refuse to be silent anymore. ---

It would make me happy to see this letter on your "letters" section. Please sign it:

(Acual name omitted.)

"Free and proud"

Thank you for all your work. I truly believe that - because of your work - one day me, and those who harbor the same feelings of love and lust for life, will live in a more free and just society.

* * *

November 11, 2023

The exchanges below come after some earlier emails we received from BD. The responses were meant to clarify our positions. We welcome all questions or suggestions that are sincerely presented.

Hello BD,

Please read our responses interspersed between your questions.

"Hi,

"I have had a huge think of what you said and also looking at your content."

Your effort is very much appreciated!

"So from what I understand, it seems like Nambla is misunderstood. How does Nambla deal with all the negative reviews or try to prove society nambla is not evil or try to get on societies good side?"

'Society' encompasses a huge number of people, and your question implies that all of society misunderstands NAMBLA and what it stands for. We have plenty of evidence that a good segment of society does understand and supports our position but with many fearful of going against the "herd." The societal elements that do support our position have a much more nuanced and sophisticate understanding of human nature and how a less hateful society might better function.

To give an example, during the period that slavery in America was widely supported, a significant segment of "white" American society saw how wrong slavery was. Though slavery has long been abolished, many of its consequential harms still exist. You will surely, on your own, think of other examples where harmful societal notions slowly turned around for the better.

All we can do is to constantly maintain an ethical position of what we know is right and expect that societal misconceptions will eventually lose their hold on the wider society.

"Another thing I found on page says is NAMBLA has consistently highlighted injustices and harm in age of consent laws. Instead of protecting young people, these laws have done the very opposite. But would you mind explaining more how why it does the opposite or how age of consent laws cause harm so I have more understanding?"

When completely consenting relationships are discovered, not only are both parties harmed by the criminal process that follows but so are the extended families harmed. The younger partner is made to feel worthless in a number of ways, including the denial of his sexual identity and the falsely imparted belief that he broke religious tenets, family values etc.

"I have read some letters, do every letter you receive get published or not and will you be adding more letters?"

We can publish this current exchange if you wish and tell us how you want to be identified.

"Does Nambla consider having a YouTube channel or Facebook page to spread awareness? Or explore ways on how to get more people to support your work? Like would Nambla get more support if it makes it clear that sexual abuse is wrong and try to highlight the difference between loving someone and abusing someone?"

Of course, sexual abuse is not only wrong but abhorrent. Where on our site did you read otherwise? Our website has a lot of content and we would appreciate your pointing out any item that could be misconstrued as implying the wrong idea.

(In a subsequent response to the above, BD clarified: "I was only suggesting that Nambla makes that more clear..." We think that this is an excellent point, the solution of which is currently being explored.)

We are not keen on social media that have control on which organizations may have a voice. Have you seen our ChatGPT article illustrating how ideas and opinions are easily controlled?

"Has Nambla ever considered adding a MAP section on the webpage to educate people about MAPs and also explain how it is beneficial to society?"

NAMBLA needs to limit itself to what it knows and is familiar with. Humanity is very diverse and is comprised of many different orientations that can benefit and enrich the human mosaic. All those who have an ethical framework for acceptance in the wider society need to individually make their case. A single organization cannot take on multiple roles, but it can morally support all sincere efforts at gaining understanding and acceptance.

Though the world pays lip service to diversity, too many people fear it and find comfort in the homogeneity they are familiar with.

* * *

July 25, 2023

I'm a 14 year old boy I've never heard of your organization up until recently and I've always fantasized about being in a relation with a older person the closest I had to that was going Omegle on video chats and doing stuff with them but it was always temporary but I want a relation that isn't just a 15 minute video chat so that's why I'm here.

David

Our reply:

Hi David,

It looks like you have the wrong impression of NAMBLA's mission. It speaks for a change in attitudes regarding youthful sexuality but does not introduce individuals, of any age, to each other for sexual purposes. Though you used the word "relation" it is hard to imagine that it merely implied a Platonic one. Even Platonic relationships, in today's contentious social environment, would easily prompt unjust accusations.

Laws may ultimately change allowing for freer agency, but until then we strongly counsel against breaking current laws.

* * *

July 16, 2023

Dear Sirs:

I read the letter from Lana dated July 4 , 2023 in the letters section of your website.

I do not have much to say regarding her letter except to say that it seems people are always looking for a boogeyman in your organization and beliefs that just is not there.

What got my attention more than anything in her letter was your response to her. The last paragraph of your response was perfect.

I was adopted in 1956 by a gay man and he and his partner raised me in a loving home. I had a wonderful and idyllic childhood that I recall fondly to this day. Dad owned two different bathhouses and you might think that would not be an appropriate environment to expose a young boy to but I was never approached for sex by anyone.

I hung around there quite a bit in my teens and I always enjoyed talking to the guys that stopped in. Many of them were really nice and I got to know one very well. He was at least twenty years older than me and he was an amateur artist. He told me about different things and showed me how to do things. He never once even hinted at sex, he was my friend. I still have a large oil painting he did in 1972. He gave it to Dad and his partner and I inherited it when they, sadly, passed away.

The paragraph of yours that I referred to begins by saying “Men who love boys are perfectly suited for the kind of mentorship that could guide . . ." is absolutely true.

I bristle when gay men are called pedophiles or groomers or worse because I know from experience that is not true.

Thank you always for the thoughtful articles on your website.

Sincerely,

M. M.

* * *

July 4, 2023

Hi!

I know you guys are an association of man-boy love, I'm a 22 year old girl, but I´ve always been very interested in what society calls "pedophilia". I´ve done my fair bit of research over the years and every information I have found tells that it's bad and hurtful for the young.

Now, I love hearing other points of view, in my opinion, in doing so one can get a better grasp of any information, so I was wondering if I could ask you guys some questions and expose some things too, always out of my utter respect and from a curiosity filled soul.

First, i ve read through your official website, forum and some stories, but I still have the need to ask you this. I may understand that 2 out of 10 kids may find a relationship with an adult as something good and healthy, but can you deny me that power dynamics don't exist? In such an age gap, the adult will 99% of the time have more control and power than the kid, even if they say otherwise.

Now, about percentages, it has been demonstrated that adult-kid "relationships" are most of the time hurtful for the kid. Like I said, there´re always cases and cases, I understand that there may be kids as young as 12 that may be mentally mature to have relationships, but it's a really small minority, so how do you know if the kid is actually mature enough? How can you be sure you´re not actually scarring them for life?

Sexual exploration starts really young, and sexual desires usually begin at about 12 years old, but I don't personally think that having sexual desires makes you actually prepared to have them. When I was that age I did start seeing porn and, curiously, I was (and I still am kinda) actually into older men since most male kids my age where really immature and dumb, but I now know that I was not prepared for a relationship even if my hormones were in the clouds, and I'm happy that I did not have them.

Also, by talking to friends, most of them admit that males at about those ages weren't mature, (including guy friends.) So, like I said, most kids aren't prepared for relationships, and even when they have them it doesn't usually last long because of the immaturity and the fact the kid is still growing and forming views on the world... Which also means, they are easy to manipulate, even more so when it's an adult who has much more knowledge of the world and knows what to say and how to say it.

Just in case, I wanna reiterate, I'm not trying to be disrespectful or anything, just exposing what I know and searching for your points of view in this, I'd love to have a conversation or friendly discussion :)

On another topic, and I'm truly sorry if this email it's getting too long, just wanted to say that I find really interesting your website, even tho I disagree with some things you expose, I just hope you guys are true in not hurting kids. I do think people have an stigma, and "boylovers" or "pedophiles" may not be necessary hurtful if they (you guys) control themselves and don't cause harm, is normal people with normal lives... But I do condene everything that causes any harm to a kid.

(Also, sorry if there´re are errors, I´m not a native english speaker.)

Thank you so much, and I will wait for your answers.

Lana.

Our reply:

Hi Lana,

Thank you for your thoughtful email and provocative questions. Let’s examine them.

Your research tells you that “it's bad and hurtful for the young.” Had you been born several hundred years earlier, your research then would have told you that witches were real, evil and the servants of the Devil and thereby extremely harmful to all of society. “Learned” treatises were published on how to recognize witches. Reading them today, we would find these publications laughable. Societies are no less gullible today than they were in days past. Much of your information is incorrect.

Galileo Galilei escaped being burned alive for heresy by stating that the Earth was not the center of the Universe. Not that long ago it was thought that ulcers were caused by stress. It is now medically recognized that it is the H. Pylori bacterium that causes peptic ulcers. Your research will surely find many more examples of widespread ignorance. Human beings are just as prone today to accepting unproven ideas as they were in the past.

At every age, a few wise individuals understood that what most people believed was not necessarily true. The philosopher Voltaire stated as much when he said that if millions of people say a thing is true, it is not necessarily so. Even a couple of thousand years ago, learned individuals proved that the Earth was round and actually calculated its size. Most people then nevertheless maintained that it was flat. We should always be careful in uncritically accepting widely held opinions, and this care is what we see in your email.

Before examining the nature of “harm,” it is first important to understand what iatrogenic harm is. This is the type of indirect harm, for instance, that a misdiagnosis by a doctor might cause. So, when a totally consensual relationship between a minor and an adult is discovered, societal reaction is most often so severe that it does cause emotional trauma – not just to the minor but to all others in the family. That trauma is iatrogenically induced. For this reason, we counsel obeying current laws even if we believe such laws are unwise and counterproductive. In free and democratic societies, as imperfect as they may be, the best approach is to rely on reason and carefully examined data to improve social policy. This is a slow process in which we find a small role. America is still coming to terms accepting those citizens who do not seem to fit the norm and are therefore viewed as dangerous.

Concerning “power dynamics,” can you cite even a few examples where they do not exist? The most common of these are parent-child relationships. In most of these, extreme abuse does not exist. However, if you follow news reports, many such intra-family abuses do occur. By this logic, parenthood, where no doubt extreme power imbalances exist, should be criminalized. In the mid-1960s emergency room doctors began to realize that battered children brought to their clinics were not victims of “accidents” but of actual parental physical abuse. Hidden from view, and seldom subject to protection is the additional emotional abuse experienced by children in dysfunctional families. As the 1960s came to an end, the physical battering of children by toxic parents failed to capture the public imagination, but the relatively rare instances of sexual abuse did. This is not to give actual sexual abuse and domination a pass. But when society mostly ignores physical and the even mor devastating emotional abuse of children, there is something very wrong.

Your last paragraph implies that we hurt kids. We cannot speak for the small fraction of people who actually hurt kids be they toxic parents or the few who purport to love boys. All populations contain those who either by their nature or through their circumstances hurt others. Luckily, most of the world, including those whose inherent nature draws them to love boys, act in ethical ways.

You may be right that boys may mature at a different rate than girls, but that does not mean that they do not form all kinds of freely chosen bonds and friendships and freely break these bonds when the relationships fail to be satisfying. Perhaps, as your experience shows, their abilities with the opposite sex needs more time to develop. A large subset of boys, as news reports of mass shootings in the US show, have great difficulty controlling violent emotions. In this case, the animal world seems to give us a more intelligent solution. When adolescent male elephants are in the presence of mature male elephants, their aggressive behavior has been shown to be controlled and moderated. The following link gives but one example.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/animal-minds/202201/in-the-presence-older-bulls-male-elephants-are-less-aggressive

Men who love boys are perfectly suited for the kind of mentorship that could guide otherwise violent boys to constructive pursuits. Such men, as mainstream gays mostly once were, are closeted and hidden from view. Many hide in unsatisfying marriages or otherwise lead lives of longing and frustration. For such men, and we know this, intimacy absent of sex is rewarding in itself. In today’s environment, because of unwise laws, even mutually desired sexual intimacy should be avoided.

Please feel free to write again should you need any of the points we have presented clarified further.

* * *

July 4, 2023

I was loved by a man when I was a boy.

A dad of a friend at school.

I found it exciting before and while I was being loved. It went on during one summer school vacation.

After each time, I felt extremely free and conected to everything and everybody.

I do not know what the big deal against love. Love is love!

Mark

* * *

July 4, 2023

Dear NAMBLA,

My name is Tom, I am gay, and I am in my mid 30s. I am from Germany, but am also writing to you, like my predecessor from the UK, because we don't have a German equivalent to your organisation.

When I was 10-12 years I had an uncle that was in his late 30s and single man. He wasn't out as a homosexual man, nor did he seem to have a lot of interaction with women, but I do remember it was just not talked about in our family. He was just a single man.

I used to visit him on my way back home from school or on the weekends, since he had a computer at home, which we did not and I just happen to have been really interested in computers. I would spend hours at his place and he would explain every single program and we would play games. I would sit right next to him or on his lap, sometimes I'd stay so long that we would also eat a snack together or occasionally I would sleep over. There was never any sexual interaction between us, but he did always seem to be very happy whenever I would drop by.

Then around the time when I turned 12 he suddenly moved away to another town and I haven't heard or seen anything of him since. I never understood why and no-one was able to give me a satisfying answer. I would end up missing him a lot, since there wasn't anyone I felt a connection to like I did to him.

Recently I reconnected with him, we met and caught up. We started talking about the past and at this point I revealed that I had an ulterior motive in meeting him. I wanted to know if there was anything more there back then between us, if he felt more for me that just friendship among family members. After a while he did start to admit that he did have a crush on me, but was just too scared to act on his feelings and so he always had to contain himself. It got to a point where he didn't feel like he could hold himself back any longer and so he decided the best thing would be to move away. Hearing that just broke my heart in so many ways. Not only was I/the rules of our society the reason he felt like he had to cut himself out of my and consequently our families life, but also what could have been and what a wonderful, intimate and loving relationship this could have become.

At this point we were both crying and I told him that what hurts the most is, is that I am a boy lover myself, and being his age back then now myself, I cannot tell you what I would have done to have such an opportunity. It deeply saddens me that so many wonderful connections like this that could have been just aren't possible because of the skewed rules that society has come up with.

Thank you for exiting as an organisation and giving people like me a platform to tell my story,

Tom

Our reply:

Dear Tom,

Your appreciation of our existing as an organization, albeit not in your country, is encouraging. But if you are familiar with our website, you will see that there are many other ways of helping that are not bound by location. This is especially true in the wake of the technology that evolved since our founding.

* * *

May 21, 2023

Dear Sirs:

I am reading your article Fun With ChatGPT and finding it disturbing, interesting, eye opening and informative. Artificial intelligence will have more negative consequences than positive consequences but that is only my personal opinion.

Your observations on this topic are different from others I’ve read in that you seem to have laid a trap for the ChatGPT program. If that is indeed so then I am pleasantly surprised. I will have to go back and re-read this as it is an article which requires more than casual thought.

Thank you for your intelligent writing that does not cater to preconceived assumptions but that challenges the reader to put on his thinking cap.

Sincerely,

M. M.

Our reply:

Dear M. M.,

We deeply appreciate your thoughtful comments. There are many more facets of artificial intelligence that need to be explored, both by government agencies and members of the public. We welcome any additional insights you may have. Our aim was not to jump ChatGPT's "guard rails," as apparently many have tried, but to expose some of its inconsistencies.

To read our article probing ChatGPT's accuracy and veracity, go to our Forum, and scroll down to "Fun With ChatGPT."

* * *

May 14, 2023

Dear NAMBLA,

Hi there! My name is Jacey, and I'm a in my 40s. I am a man living in the UK. I know that NAMBLA is an American organisation but to be honest I haven't found any UK equivalent. As far as I'm aware, you're the only organisation that is forthrightly stating the truth on this topic.

A bit about me. I've been attracted to men since I was attracted to anyone, and, since I was about age 8 to 14, have had various sexual encounters with other boys in school. Were these experiences harmful? Absolutely not, and why would they be? The only time I felt any negative emotions from these experiences was when there was the risk of others finding out because I knew the trouble I could get into. Oh, and the other times when I felt negative effects linked to these experiences was when I heard casual homophobia being used around school. In other words, all negative effects were from society, and not from the sexual encounters themselves.

I and others have noticed that - in both my junior and high schools I've been in - I've always been the outcast loner type, in which I would be friendlier to the younger boys as I could relate to as they weren’t yet in puberty. I think boylovers are designed by nature to love and protect boys, and I think that boys really can pick up on this and do respond positively.

As I grew older, so did my age of attraction. That is, until my age of attraction got in the range of 8 to 12, where it stopped - while I continued growing older. (Side note: If this email gets published on NAMBLA's website and you, the reader, are thinking that the reason I'm attracted to boys is because I had sexual encounters with other boys when I was younger, I would like to challenge you to find one piece of empirical evidence from a non-biased study that supports this assumption).

From when I turned 16 to the age I am now, I have had a yearning desires to have a relationship with a boy (consensually). There has been moments in my life that I nearly had a close intimate moment with boys who expressed a desire for sex. Unfortunately, I've had to turn down these requests because of consequences could have raised from it, as the age of consent in the UK is currently 16 and there is much less of a chance of me changing the world from inside a prison.

So, I have some questions:

I truly feel like my life won't be complete without having a relationship with a boy - unfettered by oppressive government policies and hysterical social judgement. In the same way as a heterosexual man who's attracted to adults might feel like his life wouldn't be complete without a partner, I feel that my life without loving a boy without the worry of what society or the law would think would be a life half-lived. That's why my first question is: is there really hope? More specifically, are there signs that, on the horizon, we might see the acceptance of man-boy love, just like we've seen a movement towards the acceptance of homosexuality between adults? And could we, perhaps, use the timeline of the acceptance of homosexuality between adults to predict when and how man-boy love might also be accepted?

My second question - which I suppose would connect to my final question - is what are you and organizations like you doing to catalyse the acceptance of man-boy love and the changing or removal of age of consent laws?

And finally, what can I do to catalyse the acceptance of man-boy love and the changing or removal of age of consent laws? Basically, I want to get involved. But I am limited. I feel alone here. No one to talk to about my feelings about my forbidden love. I don’t want to be a loner and live a life solitary confinement. I wish I could donate but have very little money to give. But I suppose this is why I have asked the first two questions - to see if there is any point in trying and to know what kind of things are already being done.

Thanks for taking the time to read this and best of luck to you in your mission,

Jacey

Our response:

As to your first question, there is always hope. Societies change all the time, and more often than not for the better. As you point out, science, in the form of empirical evidence, supports the benign effects of love of men for boys. It however often takes a long time for society to catch up to scientific truth. For too many people it's "Do not bother me with facts. I know what I know."

As to what organizations like ours can do, it is to continue putting forth the truth. The truth being that the feelings such as you have expressed are not only quite common but are also a potential force for good. The documented prevalance of emotional problems, especially among boys feeling adrift in a changing society, points to the great benefit that mentorship and bonding with boys would bring by men like you.

To answer your third question, the producing of this website is oweed to the involvement of many people whose efforts remain mostly unsung. You, and anyone reading this, can find out how to add to their own efforts by going to the drop down menu "About" and cnecking "How Can I Participate?" If you do not find that the suggested ways of doing so work for you, we welcome your suggesting other ways.

* * *

May 5, 2023

To whom it may concern,

I do not know the full details of the story of the Iraqi civilians and the children. But, I would be willing to read up about it and take a look. If that is true, I agree that certain people were unjustly pardoned (again I do not know the whole story).

Overall, you can't compare the inappropriate touching and molestation of a child from a grown adult to a military situation. Child molestations are not in the same realm as murder/military. I think 99.999999% of America would vote against child molestation whereas 99.999999% of America would vote against murder.

Just my thoughts,

Our reply:

Thank you for your thoughtful comments and for making the effort to read articles on our site.

The story you read is accurate, and former president Trump did indeed pardon the murderer of children. In the unlikely event you find otherwise, we welcome your providing us with verifiable information.

Our article in no way intended to show approval for unsolicited and inappropriate touching but to simply contrast two egregiously unequal kinds of justice.

Most Americans may agree with the second part of your statement, but we hope that most would definitely not agree that the wanton murder of seventeen innocent civilians, among them two young boys, should ever be excused.

* * *

April 30, 2023

The following letter was lightly edited and only for minor typos and misspellings.

Dear Sirs,

I love your website and I'm so happy to find out that I'm not alone in this feeling that was being denied by our current society.

I'm Marcus and I'm 12 years old. I'm using this anonymous email since I cannot use my own personal email due to many reasons. I hope you can understand.

Even if I'm just a kid I knew already that I'm attracted to older males. I wasn't influenced by anyone and I'm certainly not influenced by your organization. I was just really born this way and I'm sure a lot of young boys were born like me too but we can't speak up about it cause we will be condemned by the community and even our parents.

They can't accept the fact that young boys who were attracted to older males exist and it's not an illness. It's a natural biological feelings just like how gays were actually normal human beings.

My point in this message is that I was just so sad that we're not seeing a romantic movie or a romantic pairing in a tv show between a young boy and an older male. But what annoys me especially in Hollywood is that they are mostly ok with showing young boys being attracted to older women but they never ever done anything like that with a young boy being attracted to an older male and I mean romantically attracted and not just in an idolizing way. It's very hypocritical.

With all the movies and tv shows I've watched I'm still hoping that one day young boys like me will be represented on screen especially in a mainstream movie and tv shows with well-known actors and not just in some independent films that barely no one watches. I don't see how a love story between a young boy and an older male whether he's a teenager, a young man in his 20s or a full grown adult man in his 30s or 40s will be harmful.

I think it's just that the current people who were in charge of the industry were still a bunch of straight conservative men who will condemn such nuanced relationship. I mean they're even still struggling to accept gay relationships between two consenting adults being shown on a mainstream PG movie or tv show. Let alone a homosexual relationship between a kid and an older male. I think it's really blurry for a Man/boy love to be accepted as of right now with all the homophobia gaining a lot of attention lately in our media. But we still have to fight for our rights. As a young boy I can tell everyone who will read this to all the young boys like me and everyone that we're not being manipulated or something. We were born like this and we know who we want to love and we can certainly consent at this age. Our society needs to abolish the age of consent especially to homosexual relationships. There's no harm in love. Those who think that are nothing but just persons who want to control us. I have a lot of things to say but I'll save it for another message in the future.

Thank you.

Concerning the above letter, we hold of utmost importance the privacy of those who write to us. To this end, we do not ask letter writers to identify themselves and accept anonymously written contributions as long as their tones are courteous. The letter "Marcus" sent us has sophisticated elements which made us initially doubt the writer's actual age. But then we recalled many impressive achievements of even younger individuals -- achievements that are often heralded in TV news. The legitimacy of this youngster's feelings appears to be confirmed by those adult gays we know who have recounted similar yearnings in their own youths.

* * *

April 25, 2023

To whom it may concern,

It is stated in an article on your website that Aiden Fucci stabbed Tristyn Bailey 114 times. It also states that some of these stabs weee [sic] “defensive.”

That is grossly inaccurate and offensive the the victim’s family. Tristyn Bailey was raped and murdered in cold blood.

None of those 114 lacerations were defensive.

You are an organization of I’ll [sic] minded people for posting something so egregious and offensive on your website.

Please correct the article.

Our reply

A defensive wound is one suffered when, for example, one puts one's hand between one's self and the attacking weapon and thereby incurs a wound in the hand or arm. The victim tried to protect herself this way multiple times and thereby incurred those defensive wounds. Your checking the media that reported on this terrible crime will help you ascertain the truth of this information.

Nothing in the article was disrespectful of the victim. Unfortunately, in a society that refuses to look deeply into its own flaws, too many of us become ancillary victims (e.g. the parents and families of both the victim and the perpetrator). It is only when we look carefully into causes of criminal behavior instead of automatically attributing evil intent that we can better prevent such awful crimes. What indeed caused such a young boy to commit such an awful act? Can you see how us knowing the cause might help society prevent similar terrible crimes in the future?

* * *

April 20, 2023

Dear Sirs:

The article Undeveloped Brains by Brandon Conway under The Hypocrisy Files is well thought out. I also enjoyed the Brooke Shields cartoon on the same page. Hypocrisy indeed in that case.

I have to say that you guys have a writing style and a take on things that really grabs me.

Sincerely,

M. M.

* * *

January 15, 2023

I'm writing in response to your letter on November 12. Were you compared how you are treated to "dark skinned". Laws for let's say men who like younger boys to be put in jail because world wide people saw a problem that was happening men taking advantage of young boys in sexual non consensual ways. So they after seeing the effect this latter had on the young men they decided to try to protect these boys from the future problems.

I'm sure your first crush at their age is very different than the type you would go for now(well maybe not for you) but if you ask most members of society they would say yes.

Laws and treatment of "dark skinned individuals" was due to no underlying issues just the pure hatred of a different race and also the treatment of these dark skinned individuals can not be compared because on a day to day basis people will not see you as a whatever you want to call yourself were every day a black person will be a black person.

Please never bring up my race when you are talking about what you do as we were taken advantage of not take advantage. You take advantage and have the ability to hid from it. If every single person who supports this movement wore a shirt and a bumper sticker on car saying that they support this movement would make me almost see your side but you hid your support because of how you could possibly be treated black people do not get that choice.

I really hope you respond to this in timely fashion to see if you have any arguments against this but until I see shirts and bumper stickers and holding hands out in open and things like tv commercials I don't think you do I don't think you do again PLEASE respond I am begging you.

* * *

Our response:

We welcome all opinions when presented in a courteous manner. Yours is courteous enough but nevertheless uses loaded terms as "taking advantage" and "non-consensual" where the reality is quite the opposite.

You made an error in the date. It was November 21 -- not November 12.

Your much more serious error was in misinterpreting what was said in the letter section of that date.

To highlight your misconception, I challenge you to recognize who might be a Jewish person who is not part of an ultra-orthodox sect wearing distinguishable clothing. There is no obvious way of telling who is a Jew. Jews come in all varieties of facial features and skin tones. Yet the Nazi managed to obliterate 6 million of them. And yes, Jews can be Black too, and do not presume to own a race. You speak only for yourself and not for everyone else. If you are not already aware, many Black people are also ethical lover of boys.

The United States is a bit kinder than the Nazis under Hitler. It merely labels men as pedophiles, both black, white and everyone of other skin tones, who have had patently consensual intimate relationships with boys and lists them in publicly available data sets for life. Those who are not on the registry, millions of them, dare not reveal their God given orientation and live necessarily hidden lives. You must be kidding about wearing identifying shirts. Jews, under Nazism, were forced to wear yellow stars before being shipped out to be murdered. Do you get the idea?

The hypocrisy is that only for freely chosen intimacy by those below legally defined ages are youngsters deemed unable to consent. The fact that ages of consent vary throughout the world speaks to a patently unscientific view of what consent means. Yet when it comes to the criminal justice system, youngsters who are deemed incapable of good judgment are nevertheless treated as adults in adult courts.

If you reply, please use arguments that are more convincing.

* * *

November 21, 2022

Hey there! im using and alt email for personal privacy resons. also i hope you can exuse my spelling as i typing this on a forirgn keyboard with no auto correct. i came across your organizitions site a while ago while surfing through the internet, and was immideatly interested with what you had to say about controversial and taboo subjects. i read into the ideals, blogs, emails and art written by many people and found myself somewhat agreeing with most of what you say. i feel as long as its a 2 sided consenting relationship where both parties are aware and are able to comunicate to one and other, its absaloutly fine. however, with media painting the picture by portraying the ugly violent abuse, many people are put off, as was i. but your site helped my realise that i could come to terms with being in a relationship with a party who is older or younger as long as its all consentioel. i am currently stuggling with my own sexual identaty and have no real sexual experience with anyone. where can i find people who think like us and agree with these topics? is there a chat room or anything like that anywhere?

scincerly, Anonymuos boy.

Hi anonymous boy,

You pretty much hit on the nail quite squarely in what you wrote. As you recognize, the media have a way of hugely magnifying popular prejudices. The bad deeds of the very few in any group are easily attributed to the whole group. Where once otherwise decent people held various groups such as homosexuals, dark-skinned individuals, American Indians and Asians in low esteem, today’s decent people will no longer hold these attitudes but will nevertheless cheer the outrageously long prison sentences meted for age discrepant relationships that are essentially benign. There are always those that do not fit the current mold whom mainstream citizens think it proper to despise.

You ask about communicating with people who can help you understand your own sexuality. That you are legally underage does create a problem. In any chat group some individuals may either believe that you are the instrument of an entrapment scheme or others who believe you and have amorous intentions. The latter are to be avoided since the law, no matter how we disagree with it, needs to be followed until it is changed by a more enlightened electorate.

The chat room that may be right for you is boychat (https://www.boychat.org). You do not have to register to simply follow the thread, but if you want to post, you will have to provide an email address and a name. The name can be an alias and the address any convenient one you choose. We believe that this chat room is curated responsibly and will insure that no unlawful or unethical behavior is tolerated.

October 17, 2022

We do not normally publish hostile emails such as the following, but the woolly-headed thinking of this particular individual is typical enough that it bears analysis and exposure. Logical errors in arguments abound, and before you read our analysis, see if you can identify the flaw.

As an additional note, we are including the writer’s full name but not his email address. We do this because the name is not unique, it relates to a counter argument of ours and the writer invites the use of his name. We also do not accept the writer’s term “pedophile” since its meaning, in common parlance, has been hideously distorted to mean things we are not.

You seem to reference historical periods a lot in your defence [sic], You do realize that being a paedophile [sic] was accepted during the time of Christ just like stoning someone to death or crucifixion was? Are you advocating for those things as well?

You better hope heaven and hell is not real. Oh, my name is Chris de Wet. I dare you to publish this email, perverted low lives [sic].

Our response:

We accept this easy challenge!

According to your flawed logic associating three irrelevant matters, nothing else of import that occurred “during the time of Christ” was of any good or of any value. It is doubtful anyone giving even cursory thought to such a conclusion would agree.

Your introducing irrelevant matters to make a point prompted us to remind you that the full name associated with your email address, Christiaan de Wet, is also the name of a Boer general. The Boers, also known as Afrikaners are known to have not only usurped lands of original African populations but also cruelly subjugated them. Using your very flawed logic, can we assume that you too, having an Afrikaner name, were a supporter of apartheid and still continue to harbor contempt for those who are not “wit” (Afrikaans for white)?

October 7, 2022

Email received by NAMBLA

I first have to say that although I've had some enjoyable sexual encounters with men and support your cause, I would not call myself gay. I am primarily a heterosexual hebephile, but I believe many boy lovers can probably relate to my experience.

I used to work at a concession stand at an athletic facility (dance, cheer, basketball, volleyball, etc.). There was one girl in particular I had always thought was very pretty, with an ultra-confident personality to match. One day, when she was 11 (by this time she had started to become the most beautiful girl I've ever seen), she was there late as I was cleaning up. We talked for about 20 minutes or so before her mom came to get her, and she refused to leave. I was freaking out inside because I knew she had a crush on me. As she was walking away, she turned around and looked at me in a way no girl or woman has ever looked at me, even my exes when they were in love. I stayed up all night thinking about that look.

The very next day she was there, she came right up to me when she was done with her practice, hopped over the counter, and spent the entire rest of the evening hanging out with me. For almost a year, she spent pretty much every second of her free time with me. It was the happiest time of my life. We became so close. We would talk for hours, goof around, cook terrible food and force each other to eat it, and laugh. We laughed a lot. She clearly wanted to be with me, and I her. I couldn't imagine being in any other situation that would make me any happier.

So how come I'm not happy? If love is supposed to make you feel warm and fuzzy inside, then why am I sitting in the shower with the heat turned all the way up? If love is supposed to make you happy, bring people together, and shine a light on your life, then why am I spending my nights crying all alone in the dark? If love is supposed to take all your pain away and lift you up in the sky, then why am I writhing on the floor in agony? If love is supposed to feel like heaven, then why the HELL am I writing this email?

I'm in desperate need of a hug, but all I'm greeted with are the cruel, crossed arms of society. People with a propensity for actually abusive behavior are, unfortunately, going to do so regardless of whatever laws or restrictions are in place. Nobody is actually being protected here. All this does is deprive kids of their freedom or agency and punish people like us who just want to love someone and make them happy. When people have free reign to say the cruelest and most monstrous things towards and about people that would see them ostracized and viciously attacked were it to be about any other group, not only with impunity but actively encouraged and cheered on by everyone else, it begs the question: who is REALLY being abused here?

Our reply:

Thank you for your heartfelt letter. Of course we can relate as can everyone who has had unrequited love. In your case it also appeared mutual. One has to be blind not to have noticed at some point amorous designs from youngsters of either sex towards adults of either sex. Society, of course, constructs rationales for dismissing such feelings as insignificant.

You may be aware that Lewis Carroll, the author of Alice in Wonderland, felt as you do and wrote his stories to please Alice Liddell whom he was very much attracted to. Lewis Carroll is known to have taken many nude photos of young girls but destroyed most lest he brought embarrassment after his death.


July 19, 2022

We last heard from Magic, a Hispanic youth who last wrote to us this past November. He then wrote in Spanish, but has now done it in English. He writes to comment on our recent essay condemning American gun worship. Without apparent training in logic, he also presents us with a fallacy most people miss.

Well I'm not acquainted with normalization of guns. where I come from, it's illegal. The second Amendment, According to what I understood, says "We need to militarize society". I think that's wrong. I always believed normalization of guns were the main reason of the massive murderers in U.S.A, mainly in schools. ¿How can that be possible?

There's something I don't understand very well. Are minnors cappable to buy guns, or they have guns from other ''means''?

In my opinion, more guns to ''personal deffense'' only cause more murder because there will be people who won't use it to ''personal defense''. And the fact that teachers could have guns don't make it better. Who know if a teacher can become mad or like you say teacher lost their gun.

Now, about cognitive distortions. I've heard about it and I don't understand it. The fact that we are told that we have cognitive distortions. These "cognitive distortions" are arguments, usually well structured, usually even better than other arguments against us. It is logical-deductive:

Relationships are harmful to minors + there are minors who are not harmed = relationships are not necessarily harmful to minors.

Magic

Hi Magic

In logic, we say F+T= F. That is, for an argument made up of several propositions to be true, all propositions must be true. If even only one is false, then the whole argument is false.

Bravo for your clear thinking.

Peter

July 4, 2022

We are publishing the following exchanges between us and a correspondent because we felt it important to illustrate some people’s entrenched opinions and obstinacy when confronted with facts.

Judge for yourself and perhaps suggest how we can improve our ways of communicating our message.

(from Austin)

I have multiple questions suppose. From political to religious to biological. First: do you think man/boy love should be accepted into the lgbtq+ acronym and if so why? Is nambla mainly one certain religion? What ages does "boy" define? And just as gender is fluid do you believe age is fluid as well considering time is just a social construct?

Hello Austin,

Some of your questions, such as the one touching on religious affiliation, do not seem to make sense.

Others are too general and invite specific responses that cannot be adequately addressed in responses that need wider context than can be given in an email.

How about your telling us what your own opinions are on the questions you have presented? Perhaps you can make suggestions where you think our Web pages are lacking.

(from Austin)

Well there are images of catholic garb on the main page, that's why I asked. And I don't know really. I don't understand what man/boy love is. If it's men with sexual affiliation to males who are not fully developed mentally and physically then I do believe it doesn't belong under the lgbt umbrella. What is a boy to N.A.M.B.L.A? Like is it a state of mind or is it an age bracket?

(to Austin)

What Catholic garb images are you talking about? We have no preferences in religions nor do we object to any if they do not trample on other people's rights.

Your earlier questions and your present email betray a closed mind. They also indicate that you are relatively young and/or lack historical perspective.

None other than Harry Hay, a giant of Gay Liberation, long before Stonewall, supported and defended NAMBLA. Among other notables in the Gay Pantheon is Allan Ginsberg who was an ardent supporter and member of NAMBLA.

A subset of the Gay movement, for ignominious acceptability, abandoned NAMBLA when it suited their agenda. Just as in the communist witchhunts of the 1950's, most Gays have long been too cowed to see the current hypocrisy.

Were you to carefully read NAMBLA's actual website www.nambla.org you will find all the answers to your questions.

(Because they offer a valuable lesson, we expect to publish your emails and our responses. Please let us whether you want the name that you supplied to appear.)

(from Austin)

In the slide show of images. There's another of children playing tug of war. I mean I've seen all I need to to formulate an opinion on the beliefs and doctrines this organisation so I won't argue further. I just wanted to see if this shit was real. You guys wanna see teens in bathhouses with grown men. Just something enticing about a creature that can't tell what you really are. Post my first name and make my last name doe. If not cest la vie. I'm not worried about hate I would get from this community anyway

Note: The slide show on NAMBLA's main page mentioned by Austin depicts art works from a variety of artists. When time allows, other artists will be featured. Our community does not hate anyone, as Austin implies. But it does hate ignorance.

May 28, 2022

Hello,

I am a 14 year old boy and I recently found out about NAMBLA. I'm proud to say that I do fully support it.

For the longest time, I repressed these feelings I had toward older men and it felt very isolating. After I found out about NAMBLA, I have now realized that this is completely normal and others are like me. Regardless, I would like to mention how relieved I am right now to finally find a community that supports and advocates for man/boy relationships. Even though I only found this group recently, I feel as though I can be a bit more honest with myself and not feel as ashamed as I was before.

Thankfully, the large majority of my family, friends, and even teachers were very supportive when I came out as transgender and gay, which was around 2 years ago. I have already legally corrected my name and have been on testosterone for nearly a year. Despite society's perspective on transgender Healthcare, I can proudly say that it was the most amazing choice I ever made in my life. I could barely even wake up in the morning and look at my body, but now I've never felt any more happier and liberated in my life...

I pray to G-d that eventually, I'll be in a wonderful relationship with a man that I sincerely love. I am ready for a deep connection like that. But, my biggest fear is that I'll never find a man who sees me as a "normal" boy.

Does NAMBLA also include trans boys/men?
My friends ( and sometimes my anxious mother ) do reassure me that one day I will find someone who will look at me and love me, all of me, and not care one bit at all. Someone who just loves me for me. I really hope that will come true.

Thank you so much for everything

- Elijah



Hi Elijah,

Thank you for your supportive words.

Concerning your question, "Does NAMBLA also include trans boys/men?," You may have read on our page, "Who We Are," that among the stated goals is the "supporting the liberation of persons of all ages from sexual prejudice and oppression."

We hope that you understand that NAMBLA does not offer ways for individuals to meet each other, other than for work of an activist nature. We also urge all to not break laws even if they find them unjust. Those should be changed through education and democratic means.

* * *

March 10, 2022

Do you think there exists any limits to the man-boy relationship? Why does society see your movement as wrong? I believe there are a lot of misconceptions about this that people have. One is that people think the adult would be in full control, two some think that it's manipulative, and the whole view on adults that like children is that they want to kill and rape the boys. Now they may be the case for some people but not the naMBla organization. Would you agree that people focus to much on men liking the boys as wrong but forget to consider if the boys like the men?.

Our response:

In an earlier message, you stated that you are 14. There is no way of checking this, but it is quite apparent that many boys your age have had similar feelings and later as adults have admitted to having had them. And yes, when young, one's opinion is too easily dismissed as unwise or immature.

We will publish your email without your name or alias so as to insure your privacy.

To answer your first question, there are limits to any relationship, and that includes man-boy ones. Among those limits, but not limited to them, are mutual respect and mutually consensual behavior. If such relationships were openly accepted, bad actors, if there really were any to the extent the media portray it, would easily be called out and made to desist. Ironically, this is not the case for many conventional families where problems are often hidden and fester.

* * *

February 20, 2022

Why hello there,

I wanted to write a letter today to shed some light on the relationship between a man and a boy.

I'm 15, I'm still quite the youngin, but I do have some experience.

To start, let's go back to when I was 10, oh did I enjoy that year. I was in 5th grade if I can remember, I did the normal stuff a 5th grader would do, look up gay porn of cour- oh wait, that's not normal? Oh, well that doesn't matter. What does matter is the relationship between my best friend and I. His name was, well let's call him John. John had adhd, and was a bit hyper and weird. I liked that about John. Now, in 5th grade, I was one of the most popular kids in school, but he was one of the only ones I would let over to my house. I invited him over one day, and well you know how 5th graders are 5th graders? Yeah, well this 5th grader didn't close a couple tabs in his browser. And well, John, he found em, to save you some time, I think you know what happens next.

Travel to 6th grade, the big field trip! Ooh boy I loved this field trip. It was 5 days, and 4 nights up in the woods. Immediately when I got off the bus, I noticed a camp counselor, he seemed to be around 25, about 5'10, clean shaven, nice man. Oh god I had a crush on him. I got lucky enough for him to be the one assigned to my cabin, I made sure I left some subtle hints. God was blessing me one fine day, and well let's call him Steve, he took the hint. This part is a little fuzzy, but I did something to where we would have to have some one on one, I believe I said I needed medication from my cabin, and he had to come with me. That was the best night of my life.

I continued to explore sexual relations with older men, at one point I tried to lie about my age, I stopped that pretty quick. But I was hooking up with men quite often. But then, then came the discovery of the app known as [omitted by us], oh my goodness were there some weird people on there. I chatted with hundreds of people on there, mostly older men, and it was going great-.... Till- dun dun dun, the FBI came to my house, hoping to save me from a online sex trafficking ring. That was an awkward talk with my parents.

What I'm trying to say, is that not all interactions with young boys and older men are bad, they in fact shaped me into who I am today, I hope this gets out so that people can get a better understanding.

Bye bye now

-SocialE


We hesitated to publish the above letter because it may well be the musings of an adult making this up or simply shifting the experience by some years. That gay boys, of their own volition, do want and even seek the attention of older men is not surprising. The evidence is clear. Gay men, many who are now elderly, have recounted similar experiences when they themselves were boys.

We have looked up the app SocialE mentions, and we strongly advise against using such to break current laws. Even innocent talk by an adult with a minor can at the very least bring unpleasant accusations. So SociaE's account should be an indication of the dangers such adventurism can bring on.

* * *

February 7, 2022

In 1993 I took a course provided by San Francisco Sex Information at UCSF. This organization is still around. This organization and course are intended to give factual-information on all types of sexual lifestyles, without advocating or dis-advocating any type of lifestyle.

We spent a whole session, discussing the topic of child adult sex. The instructors said that this is cross culturally widespread, but very taboo, due to the harsh penalties associated with a conviction for this type of act.

Today, the media refers to this as human trafficking, versus calling it pedophilia.

In any species that ever existed on this planet, the youngest and healthiest of prime reproductive age have always been the most sexually desirable. Up until the last 200 years, most humans were lucky if they lived beyond the age of 25, so nature was working for a teenage marriage.

I was a long-distance runner and a swimmer starting in my teenage years. I also had a job as a lifeguard one summer. Although no "illegal" act was ever committed, I was aggressively approached by people of all ages. Kids do have ways of being clever.

I think you hit the nail on the head, regarding the Jeffrey Epstein case. If I was on the jury, I might have recommended that Ghislaine Maxwell register as a sex offender but not recommend any prison time, as there was no evidence of kidnapping or rape. Now that she is going to be spending prison time, I would recommend that those "greedy" girls also spend prison time for knowingly doing underage drinking and that their parents spend prison time, for the improper supervision of "minors". I did not like the media stating that those girls were deprived of their innocence.

James


Dear James,

Thank you for your comments. They are much appreciated.

We might differ however on one point. Being registered as a sex offender can be even more punitive than a prison sentence. It not only affects the registrant but also his/her family and shuts the registrant off of most opportunities for decent work and shelter.

Our society has become crazed with victimhood and punishment. It seems like the status of being a victim has now become the new status symbol.

It has come to a state where a Larry Nasser is given essentially a life sentence reserved for multiple murderers. If Nassar violated medical ethics, taking away his medical license alone would be quite a punishment. Adding some reasonable prison time would unnecessarily be twisting the knife but more humane than having him rotting forever in a prison.

Had what Nassar did been so heinous, surely the risk of losing Olympic opportunity would have been far less of a painful fate for the young athletes. I wonder if boys who have been checked for hernias thought their doctors were getting their jollies doing so. And then, should doctors who in the past used anal thermometers on kids also be suspect? Why not get all of them in prisons and on the registry? As Lewis Carroll, a known pedophile and author of Alice in Wonderland, said through the character of the Queen of Hearts, “Off with their heads.”

Peter


February 10, 2022

I don't know if we really differ on that one point, come to think of it. But NAMBLA needs to change its public reputation and society is headed in the opposite direction. From reading your website, I watched the Steven Stayner movie, for the first time, and read articles on everything pertaining to Steven that the main media had published. Part of the main media tried to associate all of what happened to Steven, with your organization.

I doubt if your organization supports the kidnapping and rape of unwilling boys, by anyone. That should be made clear to the public. Also, if anyone is convicted of true kidnapping and rape of an unwilling boy, they should either not be allowed to join your organization or be kicked out and that should be made known to the public.

In the Bible, after Lot was evacuated from Sodom, he got his daughters pregnant. Why don't the religious people openly discuss this aspect? There is also a book called the X Rated Bible, discussing many sexual passages. In all the Christian related churches I have visited, only a limited number of passages of the Bible are openly discussed. I asked some religious people if all the people of Sodom, except for Lot were homosexuals, how did Sodom even have a population? The passages say that the people of Sodom were wicked, but in one version of the Bible the authors put the word "homosexual" in parenthesis. But these religious people will come up with an answer to anything, just to adhere to accepted religious doctrine.

The age of consent laws in this country radically differs by state. In California, the age is 18, with no accommodation for age difference. In Nevada, the legal age of consent is not only 16, but prostitution is legal. In Texas, nobody talks about the Luke Walker case. At 18, he was charged with having willing sex with a 16-year-old girl. The age of consent is 18, not allowing for age differences. So maybe under Governor Abbott, Luke could either go to prison for life or must register as a sex offender.

Another comment: Why are those priests in the Catholic church allowed to not be prosecuted, while anyone else, under current society, can possibly look toward either a lifetime in prison or a lifetime of being shunned as "sex offenders"?

Finally, one more comment: Why are children who are escaping from poverty in Latin America, being allowed to live in squalid conditions at the US Mexico border with nothing done; yet, if someone was to have sex with one of these children, that person could either quickly end up in jail or be required to register as a sex offender?

James


Hi James,

Thank you for your reply. What you say hits the nail on the head. You point to many inconsistencies in what people believe, yet has truth ever changed the minds of those who believe in nonsense? Before truths can be accepted, other approaches need to be used.

I must admit that your suggestion of our stating that we are against bad actors has some logic to it, but on further thought it is a bad strategy. I do not know if you are aware of the late president Nixon’s famous Checkers speech where he stated “I am not a crook.” This statement is often used to illustrate what not to say when stating your innocence. What stays in people’s minds is what goes after the word “not.” Another criticism of this strategy is that when you proclaim what you are not, people most likely think you are protesting too much and are trying to hide your guilt. It is much better to state the positives than to negate the negatives, and we do have lots of positives and none of the negatives our detractors claim.

To believe that anyone committing a horrible crime might knowingly be allowed into our organization is laughable. Where does one get such notions? But expecting rationality from people who are incapable of it is not a winning strategy. Stating that we do not condone such acts is like stating that the Earth is not flat. Stating an obvious negative, as I earlier explained, has quite the opposite effect than what you might think. One is more likely to be struck by lightning than a child is likely to be kidnapped by a stranger. Much more likely is the stealing of babies by emotionally deprived women or by spouses fighting over custody of their kids. Yet motherhood and parenthood do not seem to get the opprobrium heaped on us for simply using our Constitutionally protected speech.

Your mentioning of the many inconsistencies that people unquestionably accept just further illustrates the difficulty of bringing rationality to the discussion. Yet, there are perceptive people who do not necessarily share our orientation but who see the danger that the oppression directed at us can easily be redirected to others. In that sense, they are with us. It is consequentially sad that you should be worried about FBI questioning your motives. Whether or not you share our orientation, you, like other perceptive people, share our concerns for freedom of expression. I would therefore hope that at some point you will see using the words “our organization” instead of “your organization.”

Thanks again for your thoughts.

Peter


* * *

December 29, 2021

Subject: Another letter from a boy. Surprise, surprise.

Ignore my sarcastic subject [line]. I just think it's funny.

I do, in fact, support NAMBLA in the year of our lord 2021/2022. Here's why.

I consider myself a teleiophile. If you were to go into the specifics, I consider myself a mesophile (one who is attracted to those who are middle-aged). I do not consider myself attracted to adults the same "part-of-development" way as an average youth would be attracted to those older than them. I have yet to have a substantial relationship with an adult (an AF, I hear some communities call it?), but I am still hopeful.

As a transgender youth living in a country currently obsessed with taking away our right to choose our own bodies, or at least how they develop, I am intimately aware that as a young person, as a child, you are not seen as an adult. At my age of 12, I do consider myself just as capable as a grown transman to decide on my healthcare.

I am also just as capable as a grown man to decide if I would like to have sex.

About a year ago, now, I was an incredibly active member of the "anti-map" and "antiship" communities online, all while hating myself for my fantasies of adult men. Not just sexual, but romantic, too. I feel that this sort of self-hating hypocrisy runs rampant in pedophobic communities, as does homosexuality in homophobic communities.

My repression of what are, in fact, the most natural feelings one can have has been holding me back for years. The night after I realized what I was (the same night I discovered the NAMBLA website), I cried myself to sleep. Not out of sadness, but out of joy. I stayed up until 4AM typing page after page after page of my thoughts.

And I think that I may have finally found myself.

If boylovers can have that effect on someone they've never met, how is it that they're evil? In the few weeks I've been active online as a "lurker" in these communities, I've felt safer than I ever have in my life. I do not feel abused. I have not BEEN abused. Even if I did have a relationship with an adult man, even if I had sex with that adult man, I would not be abused.

I apologise if this letter is a bit raw, or a bit rambly (is that a word?). I've tried to be as honest as possible with this, so it's probably not as good or as eloquent as my regular writing.

You're the real heroes here.

love n hugs

Hyacinth (an overused penname, probably, but I've been actually considering using this as a legal name.)


Dear Hyacinth,

We are pleased that NAMBLA has helped you come to terms with yourself, and we agree that young people are capable and deserve recognition of their agency.

Nevertheless, it is always good to have a support network of experienced people around us. Even heads of states depend on a cabinet of experienced people to make decisions. For most toung people, supportive parents are the ideal. Barring this, other relatives or older people you respect may fill that role.

We are confident that you are aware that in our current society, some of the relations you may wish to have with older people may be considered criminal. It does not matter if we think that some laws are unjust. Perhaps youths like you will one day change the political climate that will accept more humane and realistic laws.
* * *

November 18, 2021

A Letter from a Hispanic Teenager
(For readers who do not speak Spanish, we suggest using a translation application.)

Buenas tardes, primero que nada me gustaría que mantuvieran mi nombre en secreto. Si necesitan un nombre, usen mi seudónimo ''Magic Usagi''

Desde que tengo memoria no me acuerdo que en algún momento haya visto problema alguno con las relaciones entre adultos y niños, independientemente del sexo. Siempre he creído en que una relación romántica entre generacione es posible.

Pero entre la gente que conozco, soy el único que piensa así. También fue un shock para mi descubrir que la gente que tiene relaciones sexuales con menores van a la carcel aunque la relación sea conensuada. La verdad es que me genera una gran impotencia este hecho.

Recuerdo también que un amigo nos contó (como a eso de los 12 años) que estaba enamorado y hasta tuvo ''cosas'' con un hombre mayor de edad. Aparentemente yo fui el único de entre a los que le contó que apoyó a esa relación. Incluso tuve debates (que no llegaron a ningún lado) con sus otros amigos que consideraban aquel hecho como abuso, inapropiado o ese tipo de cosas; claro, algo tan alejado de la realidad. A veces pienso que no entienden el significado de abuso.

En realidad, mi verdadero interés por todo este tema se dio cuando me di cuenta de que aunque estoy creciendo, mis gustos se van quedando atrás. Aún no soy mayor de edad tengo 17, pero me atraen fácilmente personas que pueden llegar a más de 6 años menor que yo.

Y cuando descubrí acerca del movimiento MAP, mi primera impresión fue esperanzadora y positiva... hasta que vi las críticas.
Pero entre tantas investigaciones que hice llegué a NAMBLA.

Aunque la descubrí por medio de una crítica negativa, la verdad es que he notado que están muy llenos de información, y son más inclusivos y comprensivos que otras personas. En conclusión, los medios tienen una versión bizarra de lo que realmente son ustedes.

Volviendo al tema, leyendo y leyendo noté que aparentemente tenemos los mismos ideales. Porcierto, yo creo en el amor Adulto-niño, pero también en el Adulta-niña, Adulto-niña, Adulta-niño. También creo en otras cosas en las que ustedes creen, pero sería largo enumerarlas aquí.

Quise escribirles porque quiero que las personas sepan que hay gente que los apoya a ustedes hasta en habla hispana, aparte de que no encuentro ningún otro lugar donde pueda expresar todo lo que dije.

Quiero también apoyar a sus ideales... a nuestros ideales aunque aún no tenga claro cómo; todo lo que se me ocurrió fue escribir esta carta, y también quiero que NAMBLA sea conocida, pero como lo que son y no con esa mentira con las que los medios manchan a NAMBLA. También quiero que hayan más grupos como NAMBLA en todo el mundo.

También quiero agradecerles, ya que debo hacer un informe sobre pedofilia y sexualidad y parte de la información la tomé de ustedes.

Creo que debí decirlo antes pero esta carta es para su sección de ''Letters''.

Atentamente: Un chico de algún lado de América del Sur

Response from staff:
 
Hola Magic,

Estoy de acuerdo con mucho que dices. Pero no escribo bien en español. Enviaré tu correo electrónico a una persona que entienda muy bien el español para que pueda darte una respuesta. También publicaré tu carta en la sección "cartas".

Peter

Response from Spanish speaking volunteer:


Hola Magic,

No hay problema con el seudónimo. Entendemos y respetamos el derecho a la privacidad.

Desafortunadamente, existen muchos mitos acerca de las relaciones entre menores de edad y adultos. Y usualmente preferimos el término "adolescentes"/"niños"/"jóvenes" en vez de "menores de edad", porque preferimos usar términos humanos antes que legales. Antes que sujetos legales, somos seres humanos. Y, desafortunadamente, muchas personas piensan que niño+adulto=abuso, y no se salen de esta ecuación.

Y sí, Nambla ha tenido en el pasado una historia de rechazo, por parte de la sociedad pero sobretodo por parte de la comunidad lgbt (omito el signo "+" aquí). Y han caído muchas críticas, como cuando desapareció un niño y se nos culpó de ello, a pesar de que nosotros no tuvimos nada que ver. Los medios utilizan cualquier mentira para dañar nuestra imagen, y omiten todos los otros mensajes e ideas que promovemos desde nuestra organización.

La buena noticia es que no estás solo. No eres el único que piensa así.

Nos alegra mucho que hayas utilizado información de nuestra web para tu informe/trabajo y te deseamos que te salga súper bien. Y por otro lado, dinos si podemos colaborar de otra forma para ayudarte.

Pondremos tu carta en la sección de Letters próximamente, utilizando tu seudónimo. ¿Quizá consideres la posibilidad de que publiquemos tu informe una vez lo hayas completado?

Otra vez, es una alegría sentir este apoyo por tu parte, el cual queremos darte de vuelta.

Un abrazo

* * *

September 29, 2021

A Confused Individual

I was 14 "dating" a 20-year-old.  I had my own job, was paying my own bills.  I was mature for my age, and thus mature enough for an adult relationship, right?

No.  A 14-year-old's brain is not developed enough to fully comprehend sex or romantic love the way a 20-year-old's is.  Even if the child makes the "choice" for a relationship with an adult, it still harms them.

Fuck you.  People like you hurt me forever.  I'm 23 now and it hurts my heart I can't protect every child from pedophiles.

One of your members said pedophilia was seen as worse than murder.  I would say both causes extreme trauma-- only the victims of pedophilia have to live with the consequences for the rest of their lives.

Darren Michaels


Dear Mr. Michaels,

Had your email to us been more courteous, you might have gained more credibility. The angry tone of your email, we suspect, comes from a very different source than the one you purport.

What you say does not hang together. It appears that at 14, with a job, paying your own bills and having a relationship that was apparently not only illegal but that any other youngster with no intrinsic homosexual identity would have strongly resisted, it seems you were quite able to make sound judgments.

From what you claim, you were to a great degree independent of your parents or legal guardians. Perhaps it is their neglect that is causing you all the pain you profess. It is probable that your parents or those in loco parentis were criminally neglectful.

Do not assume that we have not been “around the block a few times” and that we are ignorant of the human tendency to find blame outside of one’s self. Sound research, for the most part largely ignored, shows that freely engaged-in sexual encounters, no matter the age, do not result in trauma -- regret perhaps, but not the forever pain you claim.

Perhaps at some point your lover rejected you. The pain of rejection is equally painful at any age.

Perhaps you were forced. Then given the responsible independence you profess, you could easily have sought law enforcement for help.

The same judicial authorities that would have imprisoned your lover are more than happy to treat 14-year-old wrong-doers as adults. Given your unexamined assumption regarding the human brain, does it make sense to put away a 14-year-old for a greater portion of his natural life, as too often happens? Society certainly thinks so. Don’t you see a contradiction here?

If we have misunderstood your situation or you left out relevant information, do write again.

Nambla staff

* * *

September 17, 2021

Caught

When I was 13 I was in my final year of summer camp. I knew I was gay but of course said nothing about it. Although taking showers with naked boys was stimulating I managed to keep my emotions in check. In that final year I made friends with a boy from another division (I was in the Drum and Bugle Corps, he was in Division 5) and soon we began having sexual feelings for each other.

We found places we were could fool around without being noticed. One night after taps, lights out, we each sneaked out of our respective cabins for a rendezvous where I dropped to my knees and took his penis in my mouth.

I was bringing the boy to climax when suddenly a bright light shown on us. He bolted but I was caught before I could get up and run. A counselor in my division had caught us. I began crying thinking I was going to be kicked out of camp on the verge of graduation and my parents would be mortified.

Instead this man, a college student, sat me down on a nearby bench and told me things were going to be OK. He asked if I was forced to give the BJ or if I had forced the other boy to let me. I replied no to both. Then he told me as far as he was concerned, nothing happened.

It took me awhile to realize I was not going to be in trouble. He told me that boys my age often experiment sexually and this did not mean I was or was not gay. No one was harmed and so he was not going to say a thing. He gave me a strong hug and sent me back to bed. Two weeks later I graduated on time with a rank of Lieutenant, a high rank at this military style camp, and no one else ever knew what happened.

I owe my life to this kind man who would be in his 60's now. I have often wondered if he was a boy lover or just a very kind man. But he helped me in what otherwise could have been a disaster for me.


Dear XN,

Thank you for this very touching story. It does not matter if this former camp counselor was a lover of boys or simply a very kind person. From our perspective, the two are equivalent.

Peter

* * *

August 31, 2021

Puzzling Request

We did not know if the writer was genuinely curious or if mischief was the goal. We however take all queries at face value and answer all apparently serious questions. The following is the question and then our answer:

how does this man boy love thing work when age of consent laws are considered

In a free democracy one should obey established laws and only work to change them when they do not seem reasonable. A free democracy provides legal ways of changing laws, and one of the tools for change in the right to free speech.

There is plenty of evidence to back up the belief that current age of consent laws are not reasonable or even effective. It is your right to differ, but your telling us what you yourself think would be appreciated.


* * *

August 11, 2021

Kids Wanting their own Say

The following was sent by a correspondent who wants to stay anonymous. He found the following Dear Abby letter that dates back many years but nevertheless makes an important point about young people.

"DEAR ABBY: I am a 12-year-old girl. My birthday is next month, and I can't wait. I'm looking forward to being a teenager, but more than that, when I'm 13, adults won't think of me as a "little kid."

Most adults think when you are 13 you are more responsible than you are when you are only 12, but actually, you aren't.

It makes me angry when adults assume that I'm irresponsible because I'm a "little girl." (Some of the teenagers I know act like 2- year-olds.)

Please publish my letter, Abby, so adults will know how people my age feel when we are treated like "little kids" when we are not."

I Know this is not a boy and NAMBLA is "Boy Love '' but "Age of consent and when are people (not just boys) able to make decisions about their bodies. I thought you might enjoy this.  :)


* * *

August 2, 2021

Questions and Answers

Hello,

I am curious on your viewpoint regarding the following

I lived in San Francisco for a few years recently and got to know many gay men closely for the first time in my life.

Never having had gay friends close enough to ask personal questions, I asked them typical questions like "when did you know" etc etc, so that I could better understand this orientation and how it comes to be.

I believe most told me they always knew, or knew very young.

But a significant amount of them also told me they had sexual experiences with an adult male at a very young age, some before they ever thought about their own sexuality.

I don't recall how they all framed this. I believe at least 2 had called it abuse or having gotten abused.

One told me it was before he ever thought about anything sexually.

I ask you, with no judgment or want to vilify you, how does an adult boy lover go about this? 

Meaning, would you feel as though your sexual or emotional actions towards a boy would shape their sexual future, in sense without their consent, before they have had their own uninfluenced ability to explore their own sexuality?

Do you think there is a strong correlation between adult homosexuality and young sexual experiences with adult males as boys?

Thanks for your insight it helps me understand my own self.

I also had an experience where a man was very violently homophobic around me, who got very upset at me, because he thought I was making a sexual advance on him when I was only being kind, and he later inferred that he had gotten raped and I understood this is why he was so violent about this issue. 

I don't think all pedophiles rape children, in that a believe some relationships can be consensual, and I believe this violent man was an adult when he got raped, but how do you deal with this issue of consent with a child who may not even know his sexual orientation yet, and that your actions are likely potentially influencing that?

S.(name withheld)

Hi S,

Some of your questions presume hypothetical situations that, given today's Draconian consequences, cannot be answered in any realistic way.

Even if someone underage freely initiated a relation forbidden in law with an adult person, such an encounter would of necessity be secretive and consequently emotionally corrosive. Once discovered, it would create for the older partner life destroying consequences. Consequently, the younger partner would surely experience a combination of negative feelings. Among these would be an immense feeling of guilt for causing the older partner to be sent to prison, feeling of guilt and personal shame because authorities claim that the relation itself was reprehensible. He would eventually reinterpret the relationship as abusive according to the narrative of the authorities and Medieval thinking social services. There would be harm done of the iatrogenic kind -- that is, harm not done because of the relationship itself but because of the ensuing social condemnation.

For this reason, NAMBLA will not counsel such relationships no matter how freely accepted. When a change in social perceptions followed by different laws comes to be, then a different discourse will be possible.

As to your question as to how people come to the realization as to who they are, there is no simple answer. Everyone is different, and life is very complex. We cannot study it like a simple chemistry or physics experiment. But your questioning of people you knew was a good beginning to discovery.

To use a non-sexual example, some people do not realize personal talents such as ability to sing beautifully or to paint magnificently or being superior at math until later in life. Some realize their talents almost from birth. The same is true for sexuality, and you can believe it, some never have sexual feelings well into adulthood and sometimes never.

Human beings possess a certain arrogance in thinking that their free will enables them to change into anything that society wants them to be. When individuals feel forced to become who they are not, we have a recipe for mental illness and sometimes suicide.

Human beings once trusted those claiming to be able to identify witches. There were even manuals written to do so. We are not much different today when clinical psychologist claim to predict all sorts of bad consequences to youngsters experiencing intergenerational sex. These bad consequences are iatrogenic (that is caused by negative social reactions). Of course, there are people who act badly, but this is true for all human interactions and thankfully relatively rare. If heterosexual relationships were to be judged by the same standards as homosexual ones, heterosexuality would be made illegal.

Galileo was once condemned by the Catholic Church for his proof that the Earth revolved around the Sun and not otherwise. Despite of all our modern technology, people, even supposedly intelligent ones, are today behaving as stupidly as those who once thought that the Earth was the center of the Universe.

I hope this clears a few thing, but do not hesitate to bring up further questions. There is a lot more to be said but too little time to do it all at once.

* * *

July 8, 2021

From a correspondent

The Next Generation

Growing up, I always thought about people like us as the old man in the trench coat. The boogeyman that society makes us out to be. Then puberty came. I justified myself by saying "I like them my age. There's nothing wrong with liking someone your own age or a little younger." Then the years between my age and what I like grew, and grew. I eventually had to, still have to, accept that this is who I am- and that there is nothing wrong with that.

As a young man, a member of the newest generation in our society, I've come to view myself as a symbol of hope for myself and everyone like me. If someone so young can realize this is within them: then anyone and everyone can. It'll continue. We will continue. My kids, grandkids, and their grandkids all could and may be like me.

But until then that I can share a passion with those closest to me; I'll remain where I am. Peering through the looking glass. Secretly hoping with every person I see, every stocker, waiter, cashier, CEO, teacher, student, everyone that I see, that one of them; any of them, all of them, are like me. I'll continue to hear the stories and see the news about those who fulfill their fantasies, and continue to hope and dream that one day that will be me.

I am you. The younger you. I don't know what to do or have anyone to guide me. But I am here, and I will not let us fade out into the night.

We will survive.

* * *

July 2, 2021

From a correspondent

I wish everyone involved in the Nambla organization a happy July the 4th weekend. I support everything you guys stand for and hope to someday be more involved with the organization when opportunities appear because I believe strongly in protecting the love and rights of a man and boy who love each other and love spending time together.  Society has destroyed so many beautiful relationships between men and boys. I imagine someday a world where a man and boy can hold hands or cuddle while watching fireworks on July the 4th without worry of being separated and exposed. I am proud of Chris for staying strong and wish he could be freed from this injustice. He also has my full support. 

Thank you guys.
* * *

By L.Teognis

Cordial greetings, in this letter I feel pain and frustration, a frustration created by the already known "witch hunt", by the oppressive situation and by the use of violence. The morals of this world have made it so since civilization lost its values. But I also see hope, because natural inclinations and predilections are what will generate trust and true honor, so I see a real bright spot in a future social breakthrough regarding self-determination and the "coming out of the closet" of Socratic lovers. My absolute revulsion to mistreatment in prison systems.
Thanks for sharing as always.

We must promote the psychological and moral support of those neglected in prisons and isolation centers, etc. We must fight for dignity and tolerance, for respect for humanity.

* * *


June 12, 2021

From a Boy from Columbia Writing in Spanish

We are publishing the following letter without translation. This can be done fairly accurately with translation apps on the Internet. Human beings can do it better, but we need more people carrying the load. If anyone coming to this site who is fluent in both Spanish and English, we could use some of our more important documents being translated into Spanish. The following letter is quite touching and apparently genuine. Though he has not asked, we leave out his name for his privacy.

Holi, okay pues como te dije yo conocí a mi novio cuando tenía 11 , y el tenía 60, el era muy bueno conmigo y siempre me quiso mucho, yo fui el que decidió empezar todo y el no me apresuró a nada , recuerdo que en varias ocasiones el me llevaba a mi escuela  y se comportaba muy bien conmigo lo ame por qué el se parecía mucho a mi papi,

el fue muy cariñoso conmigo y siempre me amo recuerdo que cuando nosotros empezamos a jugar desnudos el me preguntaba primero si quería y siempre le decía que si por qué a mí me gustaba, fue el primer hombre que vi desnudo y lo ame demasiado siempre solíamos jugar cuando nadie nos miraba y me divertía mucho con el y sus amigos, el me enseño muchas cosas , estoy muy agradecido con el, es la única persona que he amado en mi vida y fue muy importante para mí. Sin el no se que sería de mi vida ahora mismo, ahora cumplí 14 años hace 4 días , y vivo en colombia. el se tuvo que ir de aquí por asuntos de su trabajo pero nunca lo voy a olvidar ❤️ 

esa es mi historia resumida 

si quieren podrían subir mi historia a su página o tal ves si quieren me podrían decir que más tengo que hacer , haré enserio cualquier cosa que me pidan pero porfavor quiero que el mundo escuché mi Historia :(

* * *

Dear NAMbLA

I'd like to say thank you for everything your organization does. There are many organizations that claim to listen to the youth, when In reality they treat them like rubbish. NAMbLA is one of the rare gems that treats us, the youth as valid intelligent people and listens to what we have to say. I can only hope one day the youth and all people are given true sexual liberty! Thank you all for what you do

- Alex



May 4, 2021

We reprint the following email exchanges with Canadian journalist Laura Palmer because we feel it may be a valuable lesson for not only those who support our efforts but also for those who may have a misapprehension of what we are about. Our initial angry reaction was due to our collective memory of having had all sorts of nefarious innuendos and accusations thrown at us.

Greetings from Vancouver Island

I'm a journalist here in Canada, beginning work on a project with the family of a young boy who was abducted many years ago. 
I interviewed one of your members decades ago on a different topic. And wondered if there might be someone available to speak with me.

I appreciate that your organization would not condone an abduction. And yet you might have a perspective worth hearing and potentially know of people who could hold information. 

The case happened 30 years ago in Victoria, so most valuable would be to hear from members who are in that 50 +age range and Vancouver Island geographic area.
 
Many thanks in advance for your consideration,

lp

 * * *
  
Ms. Palmer,

Notwithstanding your apparent recognizing that our organization would never condone the unspeakable act you are investigating, your asking us for a perspective speaks against that very denial and is extremely insulting.

One “perspective” that we can give you is that the overwhelming number of abductions of young children are done by family members fighting over custody. Stranger abductions are vanishingly small and can be enumerated on the fingers of one hand, corresponding nearly one on one to the laws named after the abductees. Go ask the families responsible for the laws they promoted if they are aware that in their grief they have perpetuated and multiplied even greater grief with these stupid and counterproductive laws.

Another perspective we can give you is that we wish you to never contact us again. The mindset you present is abhorrent and epitomizes the ignorance and stupidity in society. This may not be your intention, but in the kind of journalism you seem to be pursuing you are spewing even more poison into today’s zeitgeist.

 
 * * *
Oh gosh. I didn't mean to offend. 
 
And clearly, I failed to communicate what I was I was hoping you could offer.

That said, I hope you won't hold me my inability to articulate the request, against me. 

 Your observation on stranger abductions is spot on. This case is a rare one indeed.

 My journalism is fair and empathetic, I don't think I've ever been accused of spewing poison.
 
Should you have a change of heart and want to have an off the record conversation, please let me know.

 Otherwise, I will honour your request and not contact you again.

 lp
 
 * * *

Dear Ms. Palmer,

The anger was not so much towards you personally but more towards a mindset that has been too easily accepted without challenge. Many otherwise well meaning people buy into received “wisdom” failing to exercise greater examination.

Perhaps the following suggestions may help.

For all anyone knows, the disappearance you are investigating may very well have been perpetrated by an emotionally unbalanced woman needing a child to nurture and to provide for her (the abductor) some sort of emotional balance. This also thankfully happens rarely but is a possibility that one does not have to have any expertise to suggest. Any thinking individual with a mind not locked into a perceptive cage could have suggested this to you. We certainly do not have any special perspective in this area. Please do not take affront assuming that we are accusing you of not thinking. You are to be commended for looking for ideas that are not always in front of us. Our expectation is that you also look “outside the box.”

In a way, even women not especially unbalanced have stolen children. This happened in Argentina when many couples accepted children of people disappeared during the former dictatorship. These people, women abetted by their husbands and related to Argentine higher-ups, knew damned well what they were doing. If you want to get into the minds of kidnappers of children for emotional balance, there must certainly exist literature covering the syndrome.

(We reserve the right to reprint our exchanges in our letters section in hopes of educating readers to avoid making unexamined assumptions.)
 
 * * *
 
Thank you for this. I don't have tunnel vision at all on my approach.
 
The child could well have been abducted by a woman or a couple for a number of different reasons.
 
I've just found in the past that being open and creative, casting a wide net and consulting with people authorities may not have considered can be helpful.
 
lp

-------------------------------------------------------------------------


April 29, 2021

Kudos

By Charles

Hello,

I've read the article entitled, 'Soft Science, Hard Time,' about ten times now and find it to be a game changer for me. I can relate to every word. Eric Tazelaar's writing style is about where I'm at as a reader and what I aspire to become as a writer. I'm captivated by this subject because it applies to me so profoundly. For me, like so many others who love children, life has been an ongoing atrocity for decades now.

Admittedly, I came to your website with some bias of my own. You and others who write about the subject think at the highest levels in line with what I've seen in other fields of study. As Einstein put it, you belong to a broad, but tiny band of people worldwide he called truth tellers. For decades, I have found myself isolated and completely alone. I was not expecting the authority with which you and others write about the subject. It's wonderful to know I'm not alone.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------


April 19, 2021

A Youth Perspective

By Jackson

For clarification, my name is not Jackson. This is some random account I made under a random name. I want to stay anonymous here as the last thing I need are feds after me. I'm terrified I'm being watched as I type this. And though I know Your organization is mainly for same sex couples, I consider this the only place to tell the world how people like me truly feel

I'm 14 and I live in North America. I've never enjoyed the presence of people my age. Even as a Heterosexual, I never cared for females my age. I was always interested in older women. I could never care for what people my age would talk about, I was more interested in things like politics and books. It's always a joy when I'm able to be around older people, I love to have long discussions with them, and I'm glad I'm never seen as a kid by them, they make me feel welcome. 

And yet despite this all, the regime I live under tells me I'm unable to express my love for older people. I'm told that somehow, I'm unable to do something on my own terms. It's painful. It's the worst pain of all to not be able to be with someone you love. The real rapists are not adults who only wish to love and nurture young people. 
They are the suits and ties who make laws and systems that are deliberately made to break down the strongest human emotion; Love
 
My own spirit, soul and mind is being raped by a government shaped by years of tyrannical policies. 

I hope one day, when things might change that our stories are heard. I want succeeding generations to see how backwards and criminal this world was.

One day.


Our response:

Hi Jackson,

You do write on a level that even many adults seldom reach. Then, the nineteenth century French teenage poet Arthur Rimbau wrote sophisticated poetry the equal or superior to that of his contemporaries. Society tends to treat the young as it used to treat (and still does) women and people of different races. So we understand quite well your frustration.

Most will not admit anything outside the acceptable that will make them be judged negatively. A colleague did admit once that as a first grader he was sexually attracted to his teacher. Such feelings at so young an age are probably not uncommon but not to the point of daring letting others know.

Our attention is on same sex because of the orientation of our founders but also because going too far afield dilutes our efforts. That said, we are supportive of all consensual relationships that are defined by the quality of the relationships and not by arbitrary ages.

The media do not dare going too far in depicting intergenerational relationships. But the 1971 movie Harold and Maude may be worth your looking up. If you have not already done so, do check our article on Mary Kay Letourneau (fifth down on the home page of our current articles) to see that our sympathies are quite open to the experiences of others.

All the best,

Peter

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

April 10, 2021

A Positive Recollection of Boyhood Experiences

By Anonymous

Greetings! I'm not entirely sure how to say what I feel the need to say, but I'm looking for information about the organization despite not being very interested in it's primary purpose. That being said it was because of this organization and groups like it that I was able to come to terms with things that occurred to me at a young age and propelled me into finally accepting myself for who I am. Although what occurred to me wasn't exactly what I'd call proper I'll admit always liking it when it occurred and even got to a point in which I'd ask for it to happen. For years I tried denying all of it especially the fact I enjoyed it and found myself in relationships and even a marriage that was nothing but a sham. I served in the military during don't ask, don't tell and was forced to hide even more than I already was despite continuing to engage in the very activities that policy forbid. A few years ago I decided to come out and admit that I'm not straight and since then things have gotten so much better and I actually feel like myself once again which is something I hadn't felt since I was young and first began experiencing with a much older man and continued to in secret for several years. I personally have no interest or attraction towards those younger than myself, but still actively seek out men much older than myself for what feels right and normal to me despite practically no one understanding how I could possibly feel that way given my age when it began compared to his. I rarely disclose that information to anyone simply because they don't or won't understand, but I know had it not occurred I'd probably still be questioning myself. I guess the best way for me to describe my interest is from the standpoint of a silent supporter who wouldn't mind the possibility of chatting and getting to know those who are NAMBLA members. As odd as it may sound to most people I have absolutely no regret when it comes to the things I first experienced as a young boy and I love the man who first introduced me to all that I eventually experienced.

Our response:

Dear Anonymous,

Thank you for sharing a truth we have always known. At an earlier time when the feelings you experienced when you were younger could still be uttered, NAMBLA published a book titled "Boys Speak Out on Man/Boy Love." In it, boys tell the truth about the positive emotional connections they had with older men.

You are to be commended on eventually coming to the realization that your early experiences were something to be cherished. Unfortunately, many others fall under the negative spell of the media. Believing the false narrative put out by both news and entertainment media, they then mistakenly associate totally unrelated negative parts of their later lives to those early experiences they quite enjoyed and profited from.

Love does not have to be symmetrical, and just because you were loved as a younger person does not require you, as an adult, to replicate that love with a younger person.

[We suggested to our correspondent to post anonymously on boychat (https://boychat.org/). Others may wish to also do so.]

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

March 16, 2021:

By L. Teognis

First of all I am very happy to hear from you again and to keep in touch with your newsletter. I found this review [see newsletter Vol. 1 No. 4] very interesting, in which you talk about the power of autonomy of young people, young boys and young people in general, from my point of view and in my opinion it is a very important topic, because it is directly connected with the subversion of the established social morality. Young people and their emancipation from the adult world is something that needs to be reconsidered, because they do have the power and the capacity to decide on certain issues in their lives, especially if they have an organisation and consensus, let's say an assembly.

Nowadays this concept and this education or pedagogy has been lost, because this system has made the kids, the youngsters, even more childish and infantilised, turning a fundamental part of an active society made up of potential free thinkers into a sector of the population without a voice and without decisions. A dependent and dumb sector has been created.

I think that young boys should revolutionise themselves as we have seen on many occasions and be able to vote on issues of free and consensual relationships and have their say. Obviously this cannot happen in a society that does not rule by its education and pedagogy, let alone by the will of the free-thinking and revolutionary individual. This is another one of the blatant failures of this decrepit Morla. Thank you very much for sending these emails, I am very happy to follow the communication, and I was very pleased to see my opinion.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

February 28, 2021:

By Anonymous (part I)

I can't remember exactly when it happened. it seemed to surface into my consciousness over a period of time. at first it was a curiosity. I had heard about guys who were attracted to boys. I don't like to be judgmental so I investigated the subject. Out of curiosity I began to look at pictures of boys on the internet. I noticed an undercurrent within myself that seemed to be very attracted to young boys. It was not hard or difficult to feel an attraction to them because they are obviously beautiful at that age. I learned that if my mind were opened to it my body would soon follow. I was surprised I had never realized how attractive boys were before. It was easy to want to look at, think of and appreciate their beauty more and more.

Very quickly I began to feel overwhelmed with an undeniable emotional and physical yearning for the pleasure serenity and joy the intimacy a relationship with boys would give me and them too. There didn't seem to be anything morally wrong with it because my attraction to boys was not founded on wanting to harm them in any way. There just didn't seem to be anything wrong with boylove based on the realization that loving another person in spite of their age or physical maturity was not malicious or malevolent. I could understand how other men could fall in love with boys. no man would want to do that for harmful or abusive reasons. Obviously it would be absurd to want to harm the object of my attraction and desire for love and tenderness that I felt for them. Their physical beauty produced an irresistible attraction anyone would feel for someone they loved. It was a revelation for me that I could love another human being regardless of their age or physical maturity and experience that so profoundly that it gave my life a wonderful new meaning and hope for the future. I began to look more closely at the boys around me, on the internet and knew and I had to accept I was now a boy lover.

Instead of judging myself or feeling guilty and ashamed it opened up the potential for expressing a deep love within myself that I had never known before. I felt both grateful and blessed that this gift of being a boylover had come into my life. Yes, I was afraid at first; confused, and a bit frightened. I knew the attraction within me was something that our culture and society did not approve of and condemned harshly. I certainly did not want to break the taboo of such a strong cultural sentiment against the love of boys. This is something that I could get in a lot of trouble for. As you know in our society your reputation can be destroyed for an attraction like this, as they like to say, "the love that dare not speak its name". Like anything else forbidden in our society I felt it expedient to repress my yearnings and feelings. I blocked it out of my mind because of fear. Who wants to love another human being in a way that all of society vehemently condemns? I felt self-conscious, afraid, and alone. I didn't know any other boy lovers. I did meet a few but they did not feel comfortable discussing the subject; maybe because of fear and shame? I couldn't even admit to myself I was one of them.

What triggered and renewed the boy love I repressed was the mainstream media reporting on the "drag kid" phenomenon. At that point I knew my self-denial about boy love was impossible to maintain. The pictures of the boys the media provided produced such a powerful attraction there was no doubt I was a boylover. Not only did I experience my boylove immediately when I saw the drag kids I also felt a sense of pride. These feminine boys gave me such joy aesthetically physically and emotionally that there was no possibility of ignoring my feelings for them. I wasn't about to go around broadcasting my preference for boys to everyone I met in public, but it was beyond doubt my feelings for them. It simply just made me happy. I've been lucky. I've had a wife and a girlfriend that I was able to discuss my boylover issues with. If anything having an opportunity to be honest about my feelings and physical attractions has enhanced and improved my relationships with the women in my life. There have been no negative consequences in that respect.

It's not something that I want to discuss publicly but it is a subject and a part of our culture I believe is so widespread among us that eventually it will be discussed more openly. I can't say it will ever be tolerated in a way that other preferences are but I think society will come around to understanding us in a way that it has not before because other previously marginalized groups are now accepted. Maybe, eventually, in some way, boylovers will be too. It feels good just to say it. I am a boylover and I'm proud of myself. It's opened up a whole new world for me. it's given me hope and renewed vigor for living. I've learned about an entire new horizon of love I never realized was out there. And yes, I still feel grateful and I feel blessed.

By Anonymous (part II)

My inner being and the choices I make are not under my control considering who I'm attracted to, the love I feel for them, and my physical desires. I am perfectly adjusted to and morally accommodated to my attraction to young boys. I realize the world outside of me at any moment could destroy me socially, legally, financially, and physically, if they choose --- because of who and what I love; young boys.

I have my own inner, mental, emotional, and spiritual world. We all do in one form or another. The reality of that world for me is an attraction to young boys. It's more than just an attraction. There are days I find myself in a state of melancholy and despair crying for the boy I love. I experience a state of ecstasy for his beauty, charisma, and seductive mystique. It is a profound source of joy and happiness such a delightful creature exists, renewing my life with all his manifold treasures of incandescent color, shadow, shading, and glitter drawn by his delicately painted nails.

I find myself pining away for him, even crying out loud to myself, saying his name over and over again, as anyone would for someone they love. His name is a mantra that strengthens me. It feels good to say his name, as if it brings him closer to me. In my love for him I feel him within me, exploring our desires, uninhibited, unashamed to share the love we feel, holding, touching, grasping, feeling the pulse of life physically and spiritually that brings us ever higher to the heaven our desires will only know together as one. I embrace him physically, mentally emotionally, and spiritually. I will cry out loud, singing his name- "Jack ,Jack, Jack!... what have you done to me? You're so beautiful! You've captivated me and I feel helpless!" I realize society, culture, the legal system, the taboo surrounding this love and affection I feel for you, discourages me in every way from expressing the deep love within me for the beautiful being you are".

The society I live in does not want me to feel this way for you and I'm deeply troubled by the fact that I do. Sometimes I panic when I search within myself the depths of the love I feel for you and I understand it cannot be erased or changed. It pains me to say on a bad day when I'm afraid for the love I feel for you, I wish my feelings for you were not happening. If I could make them stop I would for the sake of convenience. It would be so much easier for me to get along to go along in a culture that forbids me loving you so much. I gaze with longing and deep yearning at your beautiful photographs, Jack. I talk to you out loud, Jack. I wistfully plead with you, desperation tightening my vocal cords, crying out meekly, that you stop being so beautiful, Jack. I wish you would stop making me love you. Please? Sometimes I resign myself to a complacent shrug and passively/aggressively blame you for tempting me into experiencing sensations and attractions I should never experience.

Because you are so beautiful Jack, you've become for me a romantic ideal I never want to live without. My love for the beauty you exhibit so perfectly has made me beautiful with love. My life would have no purpose if I did not love you. It would have no meaning. It wouldn't be worth living. I celebrate my love for you in all its manifestations, splendiferous rainbow eyelids batting fulsome lashes, cosmetic sculptures powdering your soft skin canvas, pink rouge visions of your smooth cheeks quicken my heart and captivate my soul. Your glittery child spirit sparkling within me never leaves me alone. So The love I feel for you frightens me. We live in a society that harshly discourages the warmth of the profound love I feel for you that so enraptures me. My lonely darkness is filled with your love's light whenever I see you, Jack. I'm inoculated against abandonment knowing you're always with me in my heart. If I close my eyes and I allow myself to love you unimpeded by the obstacles of fear others have placed before me, my love for you is infinite with abundant gifts your beauty is able to dispense to all who gaze upon you. And it is because of this generosity your beauty displays that I feel so in love with you. It's a gift you freely give to everyone simply because you love yourself enough to let others see how beautiful you are. Any soul possessed of enough natural empathy to love will be grateful that you designed yourself so beautifully for all of us. We feel blessed by your physical and spiritual gift of artistic creativity which makes you so unique. I'm sure more than just this lonely old man has fallen hopelessly in love with you. That's why you're so famous.

What is so beautiful in Jack and has been made so joyful within me is also the occasion for brutal punishment. As beautiful as Jack may be to everyone who is a boylover there is an opposing force of surplus fear that seeks to condemn us to an outer darkness extinguishing this love's light. This darkness that condemns us is born out of an irrational superstition that the love I feel for this one boy is nothing but depraved, perverse, degenerate, instincts, fueling some mythical monstrous predator devoid of mercy or compassion for those we love, lusting with violence to inflict pain. These are the medieval prejudices of ignorance and bear absolutely no resemblance to the tenderness compassion and love's most basic impulse to protect and nurture those for whom we love so deeply. This is the injustice of a false accusation and it is an absurd assumption and can be easily disproven.

Why would I harm someone for whom my love expresses itself so deeply? What purpose would there be in physically assaulting or psychologically traumatizing the being of someone who gives strength meaning and purpose to my own existence? The gift of beauty Jack gives to the world I return with immense gratitude. If this boy I love named Jack were injured in any way it would be more harmful to me as the love I feel for him is built upon what his existence manifests for all of us; youth, beauty, intelligence, artistic creativity, and the liberty these qualities enable him to experience with such exhilaration. He rewards us all with his genius and accomplishments. It would be for us all the most terrible loss and a grievous wound in the soul of a world that should treasure its most beautiful and creative talents and want them to fulfill the expectations of their great potential, with a long, healthy and prosperous life, a loving family, friends, and admirers who forever hope and pray for him. A great beauty like Jack would be a benefit for eternity, for people's yet to come, who seek to appreciate and learn from the artistic achievements transmitted from our age to benefit with its inspiration future generations. Our love for Jack is a responsibility that he should be in no wise hurt but nurtured, encouraged, and surrounded with other souls who love him. None of us would profit by losing his gifts prematurely. Our love for Jack requires Jack always be here with us, so we may return with love the beauty and love he has always given us.

Yes... there's always some sick, diseased, random individual out of the flotsam of humanity that may for some inconceivable reason or purpose cause harm to Jack. Life is filled with many threats for all of us. We are mortal beings and we are always injured more or less by accident or some unforeseen catastrophe. If the responsibility were conferred on me I would be there for Jack, to let him know that I love him the way that I do, to protect him, to keep him safe. I would do all in my power to prevent any instance of pain that may befall him. I love his boyhood and the unparalleled beauty it exhibits. I'm a boy lover, not a hater. I would hug Jack and I would kiss him on the cheek, and let him know it is because his life is just as important if not more important than mine and I want him to continue living it with happiness, joy, and fulfillment. My love and my affection for Jack would always be there to edify him if it were legal and acceptable.

This love and affection would be in quantity and quality no different than any family member or relative would dispense. Such displays of physical and spiritual affection are a natural human process of development and growth. Like any living creature we engage in expressions of love because it maintains our species and allows us to evolve into something greater. Misconstruing a man's love for the beauty, talent, education and success, any boys productive interests might realize, as sexual abuse or rape, says more about the toxic people hurling such slanders than it does about a strong, virile man who desires only the best for the boy he loves so deeply.

Yes, I like anyone else realize there are some very evil, very dangerous people out there. I can assure you I'm not one of them. My intentions for the boy that I love are not evil and are in no way dangerous. The love that I feel for him is because of who and what he is and the unique phenomenon every boy represents. It's nothing that I would ever seek to harm or destroy I promise you that. It is this boy's life that keeps this man living. Every boy's innocence is his most precious gift. Maintaining that boylovers somehow plot to befoul that innocence and violate it by some bizarre act of sadistic pederasty is nothing else but the lurid fantasies of the accusers themselves, vain imaginings of poisonous souls, opportunists who seek to spread the contagion of fear and paranoia and gain positions of power for themselves, exploiting the unraveled moral fabric of a system they themselves have torn to shreds, simply to gain a momentary advantage and profit from the misery of the victims they destroyed.

We're boylovers-not haters. It is their so-called protectors who have done more harm to boys. With so much mistrust and enmity, men who love boys more passionately than other men, are no longer there to be their mentors, to be there teachers, to be the protectors all men should be for every boy, so they may grow safe in the knowledge the beauty within themselves may be freely given, the same way Jack has given to all men blessed by what they have received; a beautiful boy to love.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

January 31, 2021:

By Anonymous

Hi, I'm about 9 months from a bachelors in Human Development, I study trauma, and my expertise is with people aged 0 -> 27, with an emphasis on child-adult sex. Take what I say with a grain of salt, but also that I believe that there should be evidence prior to denouncing such a large group of people; as we have seen prior to political enemies and enemies of culture. (Socialist movements, LGBT movements all have an identical history as Nambla & MAP) In the scientific community, research starts at a certain point that is beyond conversation, it doesn't start at the beginning, or the middle, the research in this field all starts with a conclusion, that pedophilia is bad.

What comes off strange to me is that there is no real conclusive research to prove this, in the same way that there was no research to prove that homophilia was a mental disease. The conclusive research that I have been able to find is that, well, children who have encountered negative sexual experiences have gained negative development from this behavior. Then the question is, is this normal? Do all people feel bad about rape? I feel like such an idiot for even asking that question to somebody, a real legitimate human being that breaths in and out using their lungs. Yes, rape feels bad. But what about circumstances that aren't rape? So an adult and a child have consensual sex, and you make that a rape regardless of consent, love and compassion; at that point, are you the sex offender? Is it a sex offense to arrest a homosexual for having anal sex with another man, answer both questions with the same answer.

So if it isn't an issue of morality, is it an issue of biology? I can't say so, no, I don't believe there is scientific evidence on any database that I've scoured; to ultimately prove this. You can say, children are undeveloped, therefore they can't have sex. You can say that. You can say that about school too. They are underdeveloped, therefore wait until school. But that doesn't make sense in any category. We know for a fact to start kids off early, but not too early for school. Don't push them, they will come along with assistance when it's needed. School is necessary, because it teaches children how to get along with others, components necessary to life, components necessary to succeed on a level that ultimately ends their life in happiness, and satisfaction. But why doesn't this logic exist for pedophilia? Why does sex exist beyond procreation? If children aren't having sex early in their lives, what is that telling them? We are looking at this in such a blunt, dense, and caveman like way, that we're blinded even on a scientific level; and what's worse than this is that research is blocked, and prevented, because it's suddenly unethical, or immoral to do research in that field. It is unlikely, in my lifetime, however young I might be, that I will be sponsored in the same way, in the same format as other researchers; to produce information for the scientific community.

The point I made above is that, you're not supposed to wait until somebody is already developed, to then begin developing them. Excuse my language, but, why in the fuck would you think that would work sexually and socially if it doesn't work with any credible research we've established for Human Development & Education?

If you're a parent, do you have the autonomy and ability to protect your children, guide them, set rules, be there for them? No? Then put your kids up for adoption, and take care of yourself. How can you possibly take care of a dog, a cat, let alone another human being if you can't even do any of those things?

Did you answer yes to the question above? Then mind your own business, and stop trying to control other people's children / adults. If you're going to make an accusation, it isn't the job of an entire population to dedicate their lives, and several generations to prove you wrong like the people before you had been proven wrong. I don't want anybody deciding how my future daughter, or my future son is using their body for their own development; other than myself to start, and eventually their own decision later in their lives. If they want to have sex with an older guy or girl that wants to spend time with them, help them with homework, be another family member for them; who is anybody to tell me why I can't let that happen? If they're enjoying it, and their friend is enjoying it, why in the hell would I denounce it?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

By Anonymous

Hello,

I am wondering if NAMBLA is still functioning as a group or site. I see that over a while there's not a lot of new content, however I understand that a website rich with updated content tends to draw people in.

As in need as NAMBLA may be I imagine dealing with a segments of our current culture, at times could be very defeating, and being low-key is survivable.

Any how, if you're still functional I'd be interested in hearing back.

Thanks.

Our response:

We are indeed functioning! Our Web site stays fairly current and makes available facts that counter the actual "fake news" that even otherwise respectable media spread. We may trust established media with most news, but when it comes to sexuality, the media collectively bury their heads in the sand.

To supplement our Web site, we also publish an email newsletter which you are welcome to subscribe to by emailing info@nambla.org

We also have a letters section and because you bring up a good point we expect that your letter will appear there. Other features too are in the works. Stay tuned!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Thank you for the newsletter. A truly enlightening article. *

Being once myself a therapist, it was the confusion of attempting to bring about the point that boy love/pedophilic emotions and the action of; was not only morally/legally wrong but mentally and physically wrong. After group or one to one sessions, I walked away knowing I agreed with my patients.

What these men said made sense to me and that confused me greatly. As I researched and spoke with colleagues on how to address what made sense to me, it brought me great ostracization and in time suspicion, but privately I enjoyed our sessions more and more and found myself wanting to explore and embrace their views openly. I would not, could not dare. I did not believe what my response had to be, and this brought about a series of many questions I was forced to ask myself: because I genuinely cared about these men and their belief system. It was heart wrenching to respond to these men with what I knew were lies and still believe that I was a therapist who was doing the right thing. Healing? I was doing harm and not healing anybody; including myself. This had to stop!

The first thing I had to do was to re-examine what I too had been told was molestation I "suffered" through and secondly to adjust the therapy I was dispensing.

I took a sabbatical and spent several weeks alone in my cabin by a lake and read, thought, canoed, fished and hiked and thought some more. I re-adjusted my whole therapeutic moral stance and in turn, the milieu of my entire approach to treating what I now knew was a true, and very real "sexual orientation". Thanks for listening, Joe.

* Anyone wishing to receive our newsletter should write to info@nambla.org

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

"...brains are not yet developed enough to make sound judgments" - 3 things -

1.) The AoC is 16 to 18 yet the brain isn't "fully developed" until the age of 25. So now suddenly about 100% of the population would be what? A Pedophile?

2.) If you're using your brain, you aren't doing it correctly *wink*.

3) Why would Mother Nature, or God (which ever you choose to believe) make us sexually mature enough at only 9 to 13, and why are we at our most attractive (ability to attract others) at a peak of only 14? In fact, a study showed that an 11-year-old is seen as attractive more often than a 25-year-old (when the brain is fully dev) and over.

Ref: Study by Kent State University, Behavior Therapy 26, 681-694, 1995: "Sexual Arousal and Arousability to Pedophilic Stimuli of Normal Men",

Shawn

[Editor's note: Though we agree that there are a lot of inconsistencies in society's approach to sexuality, we did not quite understand point 1)]

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

December 24, 2020:

By Anonymous

You guys rock. And you've done awesome stuff. But come on, just set an age of consent at adolescence. Nobody is going to get down with the freedom to date 1 year olds. And the name "man boy love", it sounds too weird. Make the age of adulthood 13. Make teenagers adults. No "man boy love".

I love you guys, you're awesome. But you can make soooo much more of a difference if you be more reasonable.

Our response:

Hi [anonymous],

Thank you for your words of support.

Believe me, no one is talking about dating young kids. Our enemies love to twist things their way, and many of us buy into this. Have you ever heard of the Stockholm syndrome?

Our position on human sexuality is solidly supported by science, but science does not always get accepted right away.

We adopted our policies many years ago, after much debate, not to win popularity contests but to state the truth. Be assured that "No age of consent" ABSOLUTELY DOES NOT MEAN "anything goes."

As for "man boy love," the word "gay" was also once met with derision. In most circles it no longer is.

We are taking the liberty of separately sending you our current email newsletter. It deals with a famous composer closer to the kind of relationship you imply.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

By Anonymous

Hello and greetings. I am wondering if it is possible to sign up without making a donation? And I am also wondering if there would be any sort of community at all where we can interact and I can meet more people who have the same opinion as me on this?

Our response:

Hi [anonymous],

We will put you on our email newsletter list that is slated to come out from time to time. The newsletters and our Web site should, over time, answer your questions.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

By Anonymous

Hey! Thanks for the newsletter! On the day when it arrived, I mentioned -by pure chance!- the sexuality of Tchaykovski to my friend. We were talking about homosexuality during Wilde's era.

Wish you nice holidays!

[The above letter was in response to our December holiday newsletter examining the composer's relations with teenagers and the cause of his suicide. Since the holiday always includes performances of Tchaikovsky's "Nutcracker Suite," we felt him to be an appropriate theme.]

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

By Joe

I like the news letter very much. I'd like to find out more about other famous bl's. I did watch a bio of Tchaikovsky and it mentioned nothing of his affairs. I was not surprised. The great composer seemed to be a ephebophil, than hebephilia. All very interesting.

Have an awesome and safe Christmas, Joe.

[There is no shortage of famous bls, but the media ignores that aspect of their personalities. We will be examining more in the future.]

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

By Anonymous

Thank you for the short article on Tchaikovsky. This reminder was a Christmas gift. As a child, I often went to see The Nutcracker Suite with my mom. It is amusing now to think that a family holiday tradition throughout Europe and America was created by a 'lover of Russian boys'. One of the many ironies of humanity.

It is also interesting to note that many great historical figures would be labeled sex offenders and/or put in prison today due to perceived sexual deviancies -Benjamin Franklin, Lewis Carroll, Tchaikovsky, Leonardo Da Vinci, etc... the list of perverts goes on. And all of this while at the same time the porn industry in the United States flourishes with unrestrained deviancy. Another one of those human ironies.

Happy Holidays

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

By Anonymous

Hi,
Compliments on the newsletter! As someone interested in classical music as well as history, this one was very interesting to read.
Looking forward to future newsletters!

By the way, I would like to communicate with other Free Spirits of NAMBLA, have a postal or email communication initially, if you know someone who would be interested in sharing ideas let me know, and if it is possible to get in touch it would be of great help.

HAPPY CHRISTMAS AGAIN !!!!

Our response:

Hi,
We do not have a secure forum for communications between supporters/members.
However, we highly recommend subscribing to heretictoc.com for intellectual exchanges. Subscription is free and anonymous.
We will be recommending the site in the next newsletter. Let us know if you have any questions.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

By Anonymous

Thank you very much for this mailing, I find it really interesting, and of course I will be happy to receive news about the newsletter and all your information.

Well, as I see it I need to clarify, it is totally true that the term "pedophile" is a contemporary demonized concept, since as we well know and it has been indicated in this writing, homosexual relationships used to be traditionally intergenerational, something that in the 19th century was even more common, in Tchaikovsky's time. In Russia, this would be the beginning of the degradation and denigration of many homosexual artists and boy-lovers, and therefore, this would be the beginning of the decline of homosexual culture, making artists like our composer Tchaikovsky suffer from their passions.

From here to the present time we have been able to see the internal struggle of segregation and hate against the homosexual culture in Russia, for me, it is a clear declaration of intentions of the own political powers of the bourgeois Russia, that created the stigma for homosexuals, lovers of the boys, and people of freedom.

Very happy holidays, best wishes and I hope to keep in touch, receive information and engage in interesting dialogues and debates.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

By Anonymous

Thank you for an informative holiday newsletter. I now know more about Tchaikovsky
It is important to celebrate our historical brothers.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

By Anonymous

Hey thanks for sharing
This is a step in the right direction
Sharing information and dialogue here helps us bring light to the subject and raise it from the darkness
I have suspicions the most high level people at the top of society engage in sexual activities with minors to some degree.
Would you mind sharing any other known or suspected cases, either current or historical?
I think it helps us feel less alone.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

By Anonymous

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!! I appreciate the newsletter and definitely DO NOT want to be removed from the list. I agree with everything Nambla stands for and will send money as a donation after the 1st of the year. I wish you all a very festive and Happy Christmas or hannukah, etc! Please take care and be safe.

Best Regards,

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

August 20, 2020:

A Modest Proposal

By Anonymous

With apologies to Jonathan Swift

Joe Biden has just chosen his running mate, Kamala Harris, and I am inspired! Joe wants to make his administration to look like America, and I could not agree more. Who wouldn’t – maybe just the few eat-their-heart-out-hate-everybody malcontents. With Pamela Harris, Biden hit the trifecta of constituencies -- women, Asians and Blacks. But he has missed an important one…

To this end, I suggest that instead of the various names that have been suggested, boy lovers, girl lovers, minor attracted persons (MAPs) and even "vicious" – I meant "virtuous" -- pedophiles we proudly call ourselves “Perverts” with a capital “P”. Now wait, I know what you’re thinking, but please follow my argument to its logical conclusion.

Proudly owning a pejorative is not new. Black young men do it. They call each other the “N” word all the time. I know, because I hear it constantly in the college gym. But woe should a white guy do the same. I am a white guy. You can be sure that I never do that. But should we proudly adopt “Pervert” we will be sharing it with such a large population that there will be no need to be selfish about who uses the “P” word.1

I hope you don’t think I am kidding. Perverts form an immense constituency of which we are but a small part. Perhaps that constituency is not yet as large as the Moral Majority but it is quickly gaining ground. Just look at one recent president and a current one. Having your dick sucked, even by someone you were married to, it would fall under some sort of act against nature. Wouldn’t it? And unsolicited grabbing someone’s pussy should also qualify.

Nixon once said, “When the president does it, that means it is not illegal." So maybe Clinton and Trump are not perverts. But let’s not just stop there. We have Supreme Court Justices on our side. One famously questioned a woman he supervised as to the provenance of a coke can with a genital hair on it and another sexually assaulted a fellow teenager. Mere allegations, you say? I believe the accusing women! Why shouldn’t I? We do all believe the children who never, never lie. Accomplished women deserve no less.

That only makes four perverts you tell me, but wait! We have only begun to scratch the surface. Let’s forget for a moment all the politicians claiming to need to spend more time with their families or repentant megachurch preachers.

I looked up “common human perversions” on Google. Of course, I then immediately deleted my searches. No one wants anyone to think that he is into these things. You wouldn’t believe what came up. There were pictures too! I am too embarrassed to describe them. But sites I checked and that had real people with real PhDs explaining it to me left me assured that barring perhaps Mother Theresa or the Pope but certainly barring Jesus, just about everyone shared a cherished perversion.

So, even if Joe Biden and Pamela Harris want an administration that looks like America, I still have not made up my mind on who to vote for. It would be hard to believe that Republicans do not also look like America, at least when it comes to perversions.

P.S. If you are still not convinced that owning a pejorative is a genius move, think of the Christian Cross. Before its adoption, it symbolized for Romans the complete and utter destruction of a human being with his remains to be food for carrion animals. I say, the worse the pejorative the better the symbol!

 

[Note from Eric: I am not inclined to resurrect or repurpose the term, "pervert," to mean something positive. I'm not at all sold on that concept. For one thing, it doesn't directly challenge the hatred that that term is loaded with and stupid people will think that we accept the worst connotations with which it is associated. I really think we should stick with "boylover." It is the purest, most honest, distillation of the reason for our movement.]

 

[Reply]
Hi Eric,
I kind of liked Pervert with a capital P, but I respect that you do not.
R.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

 

Check out our archive of past letters:

Letters of 2020

 

 

If you would like to comment on this or anything else on our website, please contact us at info (at) nambla.org

Ways you can help our cause:

You can help by joining our efforts

You can also help by making a donation

       Home