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FEEDBACK
Letters From Our Readers
Dear Friends,
I'm not a boy-lover, but a 30-year-old gay man. I had a wonderful
affair with a 27-year-old man when I was only 12 years old. It
was the most pure, clean, and honest relationship I've ever had in my
life. I knew of my attraction for men when I was eight years old.
At the age of 12, a very good looking 27-year-old man, a friend of my
family who I very much looked up to, made his approach on me. I
guess I had a lot to do with it because I wanted it. We had a
very wonderful affair, but it only lasted eight months. I fell
deeply in love with this man, and through my love for him I matured a
lot spiritually as well as sexually.
Unfortunately this man who I loved so much had to walk away from my
life because my parents found out about our close relationship through
another friend of mine (a peer) to whom I had entrusted my
secret. My man friend was scared and decided to move to another
state. No charges were ever pressed against him because I never
admitted having sex with him.
It's hard to believe that this society, with its deep research on
modern psychology and space age technology, has not grown out of this
sexual taboo. They probably don't want to face the real true
facts of intergenerational relationships and how harmless they really
are.
Society seems concerned about controlling and monitoring everything a
minor does. It is inconceivable that such relationships are
punished with such long jail sentences. People commit murder and
their jail terms are less.
I could have had a much healthier and lasting relationship when I was a
boy if it wasn't because of the way society is. They fucked up
the nice relationship I was having, and that's no good! Even
though I was, like they say now, "molested at 12," I did not grow up to
be a child molester! That's bullshit!
I'm sorry if I seem enraged about this issue, but I still hold so
much frustration inside because I was never given a chance to be who I
wanted to be when I was 12 years old. I was told it was wrong to
love a man, that I was too young, and that this man was evil.
Of course, I never thought of him as an evil person. I thought he
was great! I knew what I wanted, but my parents told me I was
just a child and I shouldn't be thinking about sex.
You see, my adult gay life has been tough. It's mostly sexual,
and everything floats around "looks" and "sex," but if I look back to
that first relationship, I found support, caring, spirituality, and
commitment, as well as intensity and purity. All of that is very
difficult to achieve these days; the adult gay scene seems to revolve
around lust and sex.
How can gay people attack, judge, and condemn boy-lovers if we were
once under the same oppression as they are today? Do we really
want to become as closed-minded as those who refuse to let us gay
people share a space in society? Have any of us taken the time to
examine closely what man/boy love is all about? How can we then
become part of the narrow-minded team that we once fought, and still
fight, against? How could we ever win the battle of gay rights if
we are shooting with the same weapons that were (and are) used against
us? We have forgotten that sex is a vehicle of communication
through which there can be the maximum expression of love.
Sincerely yours,
R.C. Los Angeles
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